Wednesday, December 30, 2009

NPP Heads Up Tourney – Update!

The bracket is at the right side of the blog and is now small enough to tell all.

The winner of the winner’s bracket is Derf-63. Congratulations Derf. Last year, you would already have the title. This year the NPP Tournament Committee decided it would be great to have a double elimination tournament.

Good thinking by them. Push the year end tourney into February and kill Faldo in the process. I think the latter was the real plan. But I digress.

In the loser’s bracket, TresStooges and LittleRedElf battle Friday (#226740396) at 7pm for the right to play Mistermusic5.

ThePunk75 has had to wait – first for Faldo to get back from ‘vacation,’ and second for Smookie to respond. Smookie is a firefighter in Germany. He either left for a long holiday or is working double shifts because others are on holiday. Either way, ThePunk moved on due to forfeit – and that is what the delay was on that side of the bracket.

ThePunk75 gets Absea98 for his trouble, and K9isadog waits for that winner.

Sitting in the Semi-Finals easy chair is Suetman. She is waiting patiently for the men to stop fooling around and take beating she will dish out to the survivor. To pass the time, rumor has it she also is preparing a large mason jar of Whoop-ass for Derf-63 for the finals.

Ah, peace and good tidings continue to reign here at NPP.

The password for the 2010 season will be winging your way here shortly. Do you think 15 characters and 3 font changes is excessive? Naw………how could it be?

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Random Questions Answered by Faldo – Part IV

Every question answered has been asked of a poker pro or been sent in to Faldo. Feel free to email me questions to add to the list, or leave them in a comment. And feel free also to answer them yourself in the comment section. It is your blog too!

If you can be any fictional character, who would it be?

Superman. Hello? X-ray vision? I’d never leave a shopping mall.

Ok, seriously, it would be a super genius. I mean Einstein – Ben Franklin – Warren Buffett - Bobby Fischer – Stu Ungar combined smart - then ‘cube’ that - smart. But it would have to be in addition to my current common sense smarts, and not a trade. I want to be able to stop my brain from working long enough to tie my own shoes and enjoy an occasional “Married With Children” episode.

Have you ever played poker in Las Vegas?

Many times. My list of Vegas poker rooms I have sat down at is listed on the right side of the blog, near the bottom. My results have been very good in the limit action. I have never had a losing trip to Las Vegas in that regard. I make sure to average at least 4 hours of play per day - every visit! After all, I’m in Vegas baby!

But I have to confess, the restaurants and the sports books – oh, and the wife if it is not a guy trip – pull me away from the poker rooms. But, I make sure to get my 4 hours a day average in -at least.

I must ALSO confess that my last trip however, I only played in tournaments and had a losing result for the trip - that was posted here. Next time, I will play limit in order to win my tourney entries.

How is playing poker in Las Vegas?

Until the Raymer win (not Moneymaker), the low level limit games in Las Vegas were a sweet seat. They were much softer than the games at the Soaring Eagle in Mt. Pleasant or the charity casinos in Windsor, where I used to play regularly.

I could see why the retired card sharks from the rest of the country flocked to Vegas. They could subsidize their retirement quite nicely- and easily. Even after Moneymaker, there were more tables, more bodies, but less true ‘players’.

Now the alleged “fish nets” are filled with - what once was called a - decent low limit rock or attack players.

Now add to the mix the fact that “no limit” has taken over. I love NL for tournaments, but I feel this type of game will cause the poker pendulum to swing WAY back the other way soon. Players cannot go broke at this increased rate and swings in bankroll - and keep the games full.

There was a reason “limit” was the game played in casinos. I might have to write an article on this very subject.

Monday, December 28, 2009

NPP by the Numbers

Well, I could round out the statistical year by saying simply – “LittleRedElf killed us all!” But that would not be much of an article. LRE dominated the field.

But this is where the value of playing at NPP is at. Where else can you get practice playing good players for very little money, and have a good time doing it?

Before giving you the data, I will tell you the criteria. In order to be statistically considered, you had to have played around half the tourneys (24) or the last 15 or so near the end of the year. Fifteen is kind of a statistical barrier I won’t break. So if your own personal data shows you beat some of these numbers, this is why you may not appear. Anyway, here it is:

Ironman – Most Rounds Played
LittleRedElf and ThePunk75 – 45
Tigercub8189 – 44
Akensi and Douge2 – 43
Kensik – 42
Absea98 – 38

First Place Finishes
LittleRedElf – 7
Theedouble*d – 4
ThePunk75 – 3
A bunch with two wins in 2009

Second Place Finishes
Absea98 – 5
LittleRedElf – 4
ThePunk75 – 4
Mikeniks-Faldo - 4

Third Place Finishes
Theedouble*d - 4
Funtoon – 3
Rennzzo – 3
Akensi – 3
Tigercub8189 – 3
LittleRedElf – 3

Average Points per Start
LittleRedElf – 6.7
Budda627 – 5.1
Mikeniks-Faldo – 4.9
TresStooges – 4.8
Tomservo2 – 4.5
Theedouble*d – 4.4
ThePunk75 – 4.1

In the Money
LittleRedElf – 31%
Theedouble*d – 25%
Mikeniks-Faldo – 22%
TresStooges – 22%
Budda627 – 18%

There you have it. If you want some personal data, just write me and I will tell you what I have.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Douge2’s Humor Corner – XXV

Love for Sale

A small zoo in Kentucky obtained a very rare species of gorilla.

Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. The redneck was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

The redneck showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions:

“First”, the redneck said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "She must wear a 'Dale Earnhardt Forever' T-Shirt." The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", he said, “You can't never tell no one about this.” The keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

“Fourth", The redneck said, "I want all the other workers away from her pen. No witnesses." Once again it was agreed.

“And last," Bigbrimar said, "I'll need another week to come up with the $500.”


Faldo’s Confession as a Teen

“Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.”

The priest asks, “And who was the girl you were with?”

“I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation.”

"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later because our church is small. So you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina?”
“I cannot say.”

“Was it Teresa?”
“I'll never tell.”

“Was it Marie?”
“I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.”

“Was it Cathy?”
“My lips are sealed.”

“Was it Rita, then?”
“Please, Father, I cannot tell you.”

The priest sighs in frustration.
“You're very tight lipped, and I admire that you are being a gentleman. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.”

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Wingsfancurt slides over and whispers, “What'd you get?”

Faldo says, “Four months vacation and five good leads.”

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Change of League Scoring Rules at NPP

Our scoring guidelines last year was (1st thru 9th):

20-14-10-7-5-4-3-2-1

In 2010, the NPP Tournament Committee wants to reward players that play! So NPP will award a point to all who enter a tournament. This means a loyal player can pick up 48 points by simply showing up! So the scoring table had to be changed.

The Michigan Poker Forum tournament on Wednesday had what I thought was an improvement over NPP’s scoring system. Remember, our league is based off of the TV show, Poker Superstars – and that scoring was 6-5-4-3-2-1, for six-handed play. But that scoring system seemed like a winner to me. But, that is the lazy way out, and the NPP Tournament Committee wanted the absolute BEST scoring system available.

So the tournament committee has been tweaking the possibilities between the four criteria: Adding a point to all who play, our old scoring system, the Superstars scoring system and the Forum scoring system.

We then researched the top poker leagues from around the country and asked for their point structure. Some had a complicated formula that factored the number of entries into how many points you could earn for your placement. I used our league average of around 20 players a night to take their numbers as it would apply to NPP.

And then we had to multiply all that by the X-factor – how often Davethedog would play at NPP this year, divided by the number of golf rounds he would play next year also. You think this is easy? You try to get your calculator to divide or divide by ZERO!

Anyway, after hacking into NASA’s super-computers, and using Faldo’s brain (which is more powerful than that piece of junk NASA has), the NPP Tournament Committee grinded out the calculations – and came up with the WINNER!

1st – 24 points
2nd – 19
3rd – 15
4th – 12
5th – 10
6th – 7
7th – 5
8th – 4
9th – 3
Played – 1

You will notice that it is a little top heavy, but NPP rounded down! Most structures researched really reward the winner or the top three spots.

Faldo, because of his Heads Up record wanted the point structure to pay 2nd place 500 points, but that request was turned down by the committee.

A pox upon them. What are your thoughts on this new structure?

Friday, December 25, 2009

An NPP Xmas Ballad

This is a man's world!
This is a man's world.
But it would be nothing.
Nothing without a woman or a girl.

You see, man made the cars to take us over the road.
Man made the trains to carry heavy loads.
Man made electric light to take us out of the dark.
Man made the boat for the water, like Noah made the ark.

This is a man's, a man's, a man's world!
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl.

Man thinks about little baby girls and baby boys.
Man makes then happy 'cause man makes them toys
And after man has made everything, everything he can,
You know that man makes money to buy from other man.

This is a man's world.
But it wouldn't be nothing, nothing without a woman or a girl.
Without them, he's lost in the wilderness.
He's lost in bitterness.
- James Brown

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Premier Poker Lounge Holiday Schedule

Holiday Tournaments

Sat. Dec. 26th 3 pm $30.00 w/7 K
7 pm $40.00 w/10 K

Sun. Dec 27th 5 pm $25.00 w/ 7 K

Mon. Dec 28th 7 pm $30.00 w/ 7 K

Tue. Dec 29th 7 pm $30.00 w/ 7 K

Wed. Dec 30th 7pm $30.00 w/ 7 K

Thur. Dec 31st CLOSED NEW YEARS EVE

Fri. Jan 1st 3 pm $30.00 w 7 K

Sat. Jan 2nd 7pm $40.00 w/ 10K


CASH GAMES NIGHTLY @ 6 PM

NPP Change of Entry Fee – Yes or No?

PokerStars has opened the options for the entry fees for private tournaments. When we started, $5.50 was the lowest stake possible.

So I thought I would leave it up to the players as to what the entry fee should be.

Here are the options:

$1.10
$3.30
$5.50 (current amount)

There are pros and cons for going to $11 also, but I am trying to keep it a fun tourney and $11 is a lot for an on-line social tourney, in my never humble opinion.

So, vote in the comment section or send me an email. Merry Christmas! – Faldo

In tourney action last night, Derf-63 moved on to meet Suetman in the Semi-Finals!
Meanwhile Absea98 stays alive to meet the winner of the Smookie27 vs ThePunk75 match.

We are also waiting on the Boother36 v TresStooges to get scheduled. Remember, the deadline is Dec. 29 (pushed out [twss] because of Faldo’s delay).

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

NPP Heads-Up Tourney Moving Along

Again, I apologize for delaying the festivities. But, I am back at the secret underground fortification that is Niks Poker Palace.

Be sure to read the blog everyday. The Tournament Committee will be coming out with issues we want NPP members to vote on. You will be able to vote in the comment section of the blog or secretly to the Committee by email. Your voices will be heard!

Then, like our Congress and White House, we will ignore you completely, and do whatever we want. But, I digress.

Left in the Winners Bracket is Derf-63 playing K9isadog, with Suetman already in the semi-finals.

In the consolation bracket, LittleRedElf waits on the winner of Boother36 vs TresStooges – with Mistermusic5 waiting on the winner of the LRE vs ??? match.

In the other half of the consolation bracket, Smookie27 will face ThePunk75, and
TONIGHT – Absea98 takes on BigDaddyTman.

December 29th is the deadline for:
Derf/K9
Boother/Tres
Smookie/Punk
Absea/BigD (scheduled)

Be sure to copy Faldo when trying to schedule your tourney.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

No Good Christmas Deed Goes Unpunished

Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 2, 2009
RE: Gala Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks!

We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM.

Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees!
Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!
Merry Christmas to you and your family,
Patty


Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 3, 2009
RE: Gala Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year.

However, from now on, we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.

Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
Patty


Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 9, 2009
RE: Holiday Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this?

Somebody?
And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy.
REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.



Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
DATE: November 12, 2009
RE: Generic Holiday Party
What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs.

Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work?

Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms.
Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.

To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. Sorry.

We will have booster seats for short people. Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.

I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food. The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.
There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?
Patty

Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All #*%^ing Employees
DATE: November 23, 2009
RE: The #*%^ing Holiday Party
I've had it with you vegetarian #@$%*&!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your #*%^ing salad bar, including organic tomatoes. But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!
The rest of you #*%^ing weirdoes can kiss my *ss. I hope you all have a rotten holiday!
Drive drunk and die,
The B*tch from H*ll!!!


Company Memo
FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: November 24, 2009
RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party
I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.
In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.
Happy Holidays!

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Faldo Returns Tuesday!

The plan - God willing and the river doesn't hit a one outer - is for Faldo to be back on Tuesday, Dec. 22, 2009.

Thanks for all the kind thoughts and prayers.

Faldo

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Absea98 Win the NPP Championship for 2009!

Slow, steady, persistent and improving all year, Absea98 chooses the last night of the year to win his first NPP tournament! And it just happened to be the Finals is all!

This is what I have said the entire time. Persistency pays off. Chugging thru the season, picking up points when he could, Absea made it to the finals with a Total Points seat, and not by winning any quarter. Or winning a tourney in any quarter! Its called ‘grinding’ in the truest sense.

Let’s see how it happened:

<1 min: ThePunk75 moves all-in first hand. Twss

21 min: Blinds 15 – 30: Theedouble*d (6th) (830 chips) is the only one who calls Absea98’s raise to 120. The flop is [5s Ah 6d] and they get them all in. DD with (Ac Jc) and Absea with (55), and DD doesn’t catch up.

40 min: Blinds 25 – 50: A battle of the blinds as Absea98 calls Tomservo2’s (5th) BB. The flop is [2c 5s Th]. Absea bets a blind and is called. The turn [4h]. Absea bets two blinds and is called. The river is a [7c]. Absea (A3) bets enough with his straight to put Tom all-in, and Tom calls with his two pair. Ouch!

44 min: Blinds 25 – 50: ThePunk75 (4th) goes with (Ac Qh), but Absea98 is holding (Ad Ks). Normally, the suits would not matter in a hand like this as a [Q] falls on the flop. But so do two spades – and runner runner spades ships it to Absea. One of those painful behind – ahead – lost hands.

Break:

Absea98 5315
LittleRedElf 2440
Douge2 1245

66 min: Blinds 75-150: The two short-stacks (SS) have to collide. And Douge2 (1020 chips) (A9) moves in and LittleRedElf (1765) (KQ) calls. Our run away season point leader is in trouble.

68 min: Blinds 75-150: LRE gets even with Doug chip-wise as his (A8) hits an [A] to defeat Doug’s (99).

71 min: Blinds 75-150: At it again! This time Douge gets crippled as his (33) gets over-paired again by LRE’s (AJ) on the flop. Doug is down to less than two big blinds!

74 min: Blinds 100 – 200: Absea98 calls Douge2’s (3rd) blind. The flop is [6d 3s 5s] – a floater’s paradise. Absea bets a blind and Doug calls. The river is an [As]. Doug moves in with (Th 4c) – bluffing the flush or {A} - with an inside straight draw, but Absea is not going anywhere with (A2). A blank falls on the river.

Heads up: Absea98 6600 - 2400 LittleRedElf

86 min: Blinds 100 – 200: Absea 5720 (8d 8c) - 3280 LRE (Ah 5d)
Absea raises to 800 and gets called. Flop [Ad 9d 4h] and it is checked.
Turn [Td] and the Elf moves in and is called. Elf takes the lead!

86 min: Blinds 100 – 200: Absea 2440 (As Ks) - 6560 LRE (Kd Js)
LRE raises to 600 and Absea correctly moves all-in. LRE calls, and we are all even!

90 min: Blinds 100 – 200: Absea 4480 (Kh Js) - 4520 LRE (Ad Ac)
LRE raises to 600 and Absea calls. The flop looks like death for Absea [Jd 2s 3c] (18%) as all his money gets in and LRE (82%) of course calls. But a [K] hits the turn and it is all but over.

91 min: 100 – 200: Absea 8960 (5d 3d) - 40 LRE (Ah 8s)
LRE (2nd) has to go with (Ah 8s), and Absea has to call with anything (5d 3d). The flop had a 3 and the turn was a 3, and Absea is NPP’s 2009 Champion!

Congratulations to Absea98 first win at NPP (49th player), and it came at the best possible moment.

And congratulations to all the Finalists, and to LittleRedElf on his dominating league total win.

1st – Absea98
2nd – LittleRedElf
3rd – Douge2
4th – ThePunk75
5th – Tomservo2
6th – Theedouble*d

Watch the blog for statistics and voting preferences for next year! - Faldo

ThePunk75 and T3chlady Make NPP Proud!

Lady’s first:

T3chlady first finishes 8th in a 180 person tourney on PokerStars.

Then, she follows that up with winning a seat to the Mini FTOPS event #10 on Full Tilt Poker in an 80 player SNG. Nice. I will let her tell the tale of the FTOPS:

“I made a move with 12000 in chips when the blinds were 500/1000. They go up pretty fast. Anyway I was eliminated at about 6000 out of 18000 when my 99 lost against KK.

I was playing well and they paid from position 2100 up. I could have sat back, I suppose, but I would have been seriously short stacked unless I started getting some premium hands (and it wasn’t a premium hand kind of afternoon).

I’m disappointed but I will go for it again soon.” - Jean

Now, from the Punk and his finish in the PokerStars ‘Outlast the Pro’s Tourney’

“Daniel Negreanu, Elky, Chris Moneymaker, and Dennis Phillips got nothing on me last night. Well mainly because I wasn’t at their tables. I played in the Outlast the Pro's tournament last night and finished 13th. I could smell the final table but the usual PokerStars shenanigans eventually caught up to me. Some highlights.

Early on played sparingly, picking my spots to chip up, and gradually building my stack. Got my chips in with the best hand, seems like I had AK vs AJ all night. My first major chip up was a mistake by a chip leader he mis-clicked and raised nearly my whole stack, I was in BB with AK, I re-raised all in, and he had to call. He had A2. That got me deep into the leaderboard.

My KK vs AK got me into the top ten. When we got to about 25 players left I had a mega triple up MY AA vs QQ vs AQ. That got me into the top 3 and a commanding chip stack to make it to the FT. But, of course PS had other plans for me.

Down to two tables, I ran into the fish that refused to fold to my re-raises on flop and turn eventually getting all his chips in on the turn with his flush draw to my top pair. The flush hit on river and I lost half my stack. That put me on monkey tilt and I raised UTG with KJ and the BB re-raised all in with AK, I had him covered, but another chunk was lost. I had gone from top 3 in chips to one of the short stacks.

Luckily I still had enough that my AIPF had some weight to them and I could steal the blinds and chip back up into decent shape. I got a double up my A9 vs QQ. I made a straight on the turn. Soon after that I raised all in pre-flop with AK but of course I ran into AA, and it was over on the flop as QQQ hit.

Ended up in 13th place, a 15x my buy-in cash, plus the bonus paid by PS for outlasting all of their pros.” - Punk

Very nice job to both of you! And thanks for the news.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Captain Joe’s Grill and Chill – A Winner

At the Whitmore Lake exit off of US-23, I think I found a man’s steakhouse!

Stopped in for a Sunday steak dinner, and found a winner. The atmosphere is sparse and ‘no frills’, so women may not like it. But I liked the airy – almost cafeteria style seating. There are cozy booths along the walls, however.

I headed to the bar where I tried Michigan’s own Founder’s Dirty Bastard Scotch Ale on draught. It was a slightly lighter than Guinness beer, but with 8.5% alcohol. It was a perfect beer to accompany my oven-baked French onion soup, garlic mashed potatoes and filet mignon.

Captain Joe’s specials include 50-cent wings and $2 domestic pints WHENEVER UofM, MSU, Pistons, Red Wings, or Lions are on TV. They have quite a few big screen TV’s around to watch the action.

There is a downside. After a steak dinner, there is nothing like a cigar and one more brew-ski for dessert. But this is a smoke-free restaurant.

To accommodate, the same owners own CJ Sports Bar – which is attached to Captain Joe’s on the north side. CJ’s allows smoking, and is even contemplating adding a humidor to the bar.

Guys - if you are looking for a no-frills man’s steak dinner - you should give this place a try.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Priceless Moments in History



Sending them all your money when you could very easily keep it all - and the jobs here. Stupid.

Letting them get off scot-free when 17 of 19 of their citizens did 9/11. Criminal.

Bowing before them as President of the United States? Priceless.

There is some insanity that can't be explained. For the rest of the insanity - there's Democrats.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Increase Your Stack by 2100%, in Four Hands!!!

twss - Whitmore Lake – November 29, 2009 – as told by Ryan “Pingsticks” W.

“I’m going to tell this story from my perspective, having already been knocked out of this tournament midway and having to sweat my ride home for the remainder of the game.

A little insight into what happened leading up to quite possibly the most sick and unlikely run I’ve ever seen during end-game tournament poker: 56 players bought in for $20 and received 8,000 in chips – pretty standard freeze-out tournament. Top five would get paid ($350; $220; $150; $100; $75).

Just before the first break, Brian “Allinduces” H. (Premier Poker Lounge Manager) chipped all the way up to 50k in chips, when the chip average was about 15k. It would be safe to say he was chip-leader at this point. Play resumes, and before you know it, Brian loses a few good-sized pots seeing his stack dwindle down to around 20k. No big deal, right? That’s poker.

Fast-forward: 9 players made the final table with a chip average of about 50k. Having hung around long enough to make it, Brian drew seat 3 (BB) with 14k in chips. Blinds are 3,000/6,000 at this point, and everyone is essentially in push-mode. Given how volatile this game can be, and how demanding this structure is at the end, sometimes you can just fold your way into the money.

It would be correct to say that Brian was going against his belief in the “M” strategy (which I also highly believe in), but I’m not writing this to spite his going against this strategy, or to say that he is a luck-box (Brian is an exceptional player with a knowledgeable outlook on the game). What you are about to read is one of the most unlikely sequences I have ever witnessed.

*First hand in the BB: 3s4s
- A raise, a call, a re-raise, and Brian reluctantly folds.
- One player is knocked out.
- Board wouldn’t have helped, down to 8k in chips. Still in.

*Second hand in the SB: 6-2off
- More raising, calling, pushing, and Brian folds again.
- Another player is knocked out.
- Board once again wouldn’t have helped, down to 5k in chips. Still in.

*Brian folds around until his next BB
- Another player is knocked out during this orbit.
- Down to 6 players – money bubble.
- KEY POINT: Brian asks for a “pay the bubble” and is denied.

(Insane sequence of four hands – chip average is 75k)

*Brian holds Kd7d, and is all-in with 5k in the BB (which is actually 6k)
- UTG raises with Qd5d (not sure why) to isolate. Folds around.
- Brian’s hand holds up, and he now has 13k in chips.
- OK. I’ve seen this before. Then this happens…

*Brian holds AsAc in the SB (3k)
- EP limps, folds around and Brian goes all-in for 13k total.
- BB (who just doubled him up) calls with K-8off. EP folds.
- Brian flips his aces over, and the BB moans “seriously?”
- Aces hold, and Brian now has 32k in chips. Good timing, right?

*Brian holds Q-Q on the button
- EP limps, Hi-Jack raises it up to 20k with 10-10.
- Brian goes all-in for 32k total, folds around to Hi-Jack.
- He calls. Brian flips over his queens.
- We now have a crowd of about 20 people watching.
- Everyone is in shock, the queens hold, and Brian now has over 70k! Wow!

*Brian holds K-K in the cutoff
- MP limps, Hi-Jack raises it up to 20k.
- Brian pauses, then goes all-in for 70k+. Folds around to original raiser.
- Raiser says, “Man, you really have a monster again?”
- He eventually folds, saying he had J-J. Everyone is waiting…
- Brian flips over his kings, and everyone lets out a sigh of “WTF?”
- Brian now has 105k in chips, and is by-far the chip leader.
- KEY POINT #2: All players now agree to pay the bubble!

*The next hand, Brian holds 10-7off
- Folds around to him, and he folds, much to the chagrin of the crowd.
- In the four consecutive hands before this one, Brian has increased his stack from 5,000 in chips to 105,000 in chips – a whopping 2100%! Remarkable.

Talk about the old saying “a chip and a chair” actually coming true.

Brian rallied all the way to the end, knocking out players and facing a tough opponent heads-up, eventually settling for second place. When considering the dramatic turn of events that occurred, second place is not too shabby at all. Way to go, Brian!”

Friday, December 11, 2009

Douge2’s Humor Corner – XXIV

Pennies to Heaven

One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the pastor of a church found a pink envelope containing $1,000.

It happened again the next week.

The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw a little old lady put the distinctive pink envelope in the plate.

This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.
"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated.

"Why yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money, and I tithe to God."

The pastor replied, "That's wonderful, how much does your son send you?"
The old lady said, "$10,000 a week."

The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful; What does he do for a living?"
"He is a veterinarian," she answered.

"That is an honorable profession," the pastor said. "Where does he practice?"
The old lady said proudly, "In Nevada. He has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas and one in Reno.”

That’s Bull!

An ATF officer stops at a ranch up in Oklahoma and talks with the owner, an old farmer. He tells the farmer, “I need to inspect your property for illegally grown drugs.”

The old farmer says, “Okay, but make sure you don't go in that field over there.”

The officer verbally explodes saying, “Mister, I have the authority of the Government with me.” Reaching into his rear pant pocket and removing his Police badge, the officer proudly displays it to the farmer.

“See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish, on any land. There is nothing to stop me - this badge gives me the right. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?”

The farmer nods politely and goes about his chores.

Within minutes, the farmer hears loud screams and sees the officer running for his life. Close behind is the farmer's bull. With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer. The officer is clearly terrified.

The old farmer immediately throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs...“Your badge! Show him your badge!!!”

Thursday, December 10, 2009

NPP Heads-Up Tournament Bracket!

Remember, it is a double knockout tourney! So you have to lose twice to be knocked out.
The rules are simple. Contact your opponent, Faldo and the blog often – and trash talk always!

Round 1 Winners Bracket

Derf-63 vs
BigDaddyTman

Bigbrimar vs
Boother36

T3chlady vs
K9isadog

ThePunk75 vs
Wingsfancurt

LittleRedElf vs
Mistermusic5

Funtoon vs
Smookie27

Absea98 vs
TresStooges

Suetman vs
Faldo

Contact your opponent and let me know your game day and time – then I will schedule it!
Get’er done!

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Smookie27 Wins His 1st NPP Tourney!

It was a classic – and at the same time – typical night of poker at NPP. First a dogfight was to ensue for the last two seats for the NPP Finals next week. But in a surprise, Kensik – on of the players still in the running – was a no show. Hope everything is cool. It’s a shocker because Kensik made a great run to get into that position.

But we also had a new player join us as Owetheshark came aboard. Welcome Mark. And in a surprise, a player from the past returned – Smookie27 – and he came back with a vengeance, wiping out 19 players.

I guess being a new father gave him the motivation to take money out of Faldo’s pockets.

Now, on to the action:

2 min: Faldo played tonight so I did not see how Jenski6 (20th) played her top pair, running into LittleRedElf’s flush.

27 min: Again, Faldo is busy losing chips on his table and doesn’t see a short-stacked (SS) Funtoon (19th) go out.

30 min: A (SS) Owetheshark (18th) gets the typical new player greeting at NPP and goes out against Douge2’s flush.
39 min: Midway2933 (17th) tries with (QJ), but Mikeniks-Faldo has (KK).
43 min: Tomservo2’s (16th) (JJ) loses when he gets all in on a flop of [AA4], but BigLou93 is holding (A5).

45 min: BigDaddyTman (15th) sees his (KK) get run over by BigLou93, holding (77), as a middle straight gets there. Trust me - Lou has been on the other side of a ton of those this season.

50 min: A SS Rennzzo (14th) gets all-in with (A8) but T3chlady holds (KK). A great season, but Rennzzo comes up short of a Finals seat. Only one left who can still jump over and in – Tigercub8189.

Look at this! The big guns of NPP were blazing on the last night of the league!

1st Break:
Absea98 4445 (in the driver’s seat for a seat!)
LittleRedElf 4065 (has his seat)
Theedouble*d 3895 (has his seat)
Mikeniks-Faldo 2895 (has his seat)
ThePunk75 2845 (has his seat)
Douge2 2560 (in good shape for a seat)
T3chlady 1960
Budda627 1720
Birdy333 1490
Biglou93 1360
Tigercub8189 1125 (has to finish at least 2nd. Better get on it. twhs)
Smookie27 1055
Derf-63 585

61 min: A SS Derf-63 (13th) has to go with (A8) (63%) but Birdy333 has (75) (37%) and hits a [7] on the river.

63 min: Tigercub8189 (12th) does all he can do as he sees his (Ah Kh) (73%) get run down by LittleRedElf’s (A8) (23%), with an [8] on the flop.

A great season for Tiger, but no seat for him. Congratulations to Absea98 and Douge2!

75 min: Budda627 (11th) is executed, but Faldo doesn’t see it –watching the next hand.
76 min: Biglou93’s (10th) (TT) loses to Smookie27’s (AK), with an [A] on the flop.
80 min: ThePunk75 (9th) loses with (AK) to Absea98’s (JJ).

85 min: A SS Douge2 (8th) goes with (77), as does a not as bad SS LittleRedElf with (55), as does another SS Mikeniks-Faldo with (Ad Jd). A [J] on the flop carries Faldo!

102 min: A semi SS Birdy333 (7th) has to go with (22), when the board grants her a poisoned full house as Mikeniks-Faldo holds the bigger property. twss

109 min: Absea98 (6th) goes with (55) but Smookie27 is holding (KK).

111 min: A SS T3chlady (5th) has to try with (A8) but cannot overtake Theedouble*d’s (44).

115 min: A SS LittleRedElf (4th) has to go with (88), but Mikeniks-Faldo is holding (JJ).

117 min: Theedouble*s (3rd) loses with (KK) to Mikeniks-Faldo’s (A9) as the flop is [A9Q]. A short-stacked DD pushed and could not catch up.

Heads up: Mikeniks-Faldo 20400 - 9600 Smookie27

Smookie may not realize it, but he has Faldo right where he wants him. Heads up – as Faldo’s heads up record looks like the Trammell Tigers, Harkness Wings and the Lions – all rolled into one record.

2nd Break: Mikeniks-Faldo 20400 - Smookie27 9600

122 min: Smookie27 calls with (AQ), but Faldo has (AK). A [Q] on the flop and the river puts the smash on Faldo.

Mikeniks-Faldo 7000 - Smookie27 23000

125 min: Heads up: Mikeniks-Faldo 15000 - Smookie27 15,000
130 min: Heads up: Mikeniks-Faldo 14500 - Smookie27 15,500

134 min: A worn down Mikeniks-Faldo (2nd) goes with (54), but Smookie27 holds (AQ) and it holds up.

Congratulations to Smookie27 on his first win at NPP. And congratulations to the Finalists, who are posted on the right side of the blog!!!

1st – Smookie27
2nd – Mikeniks-Faldo
3rd – Theedouble*d
4th – LittleRedElf
5th – T3chlady
6th – Absea98
7th – Birdy333
8th – Douge2
9th – ThePunk75

And a public service announcement. Please support Douge2 in this effort if you can.

From Douge2:
“This is my Sportsman's Club's 1st attempt at a fundraiser.
Texas Holdem Poker Tournament.

Licensee: Tri-County Sportsmen’s League
License Number: M53508
Net Proceeds Go to Tri-County Sportsmen’s League’s General Funds
Date: Saturday, 12/12/09
 
Time: Registration Starts at 5pm Tournament Play Starts at 6pm
(Play will end by 2am—you don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here!)
Place: Tri-County Sportsmen’s League (Lower Level)
8640 Moon Road
Saline, Michigan 429-9561

No Rebuys
Blinds Double Every 20 Minutes”

Contact Dave Hemovich for more information
734-429-1809 or dthemo@comcast.net

Monday, December 07, 2009

Sign up for the NPP Heads-Up Tournament on PokerStars

This was the invention of Nahanni74. She has not played at NPP in a while, and I don’t know why. The league is not as talented without her. Anyway, this was the original (and still valid) set up:

“Can we do a heads-up bracket tournament for the first 16 RSVP’s between Dec. 9 and the start of the new league? Like the heads up NBC Championship? Here is what I am thinking…

[Ed. Note: Not responsible for the content of women thinking or the damage wrought by same]

[New Ed. Note: This is actually turned out to be a great idea, and a good tourney set up! I guess I should retract the sarcastic, rude and chauvinistic comment I made last year.]

[New New Ed. Note: Or Not!]

Send in email to npokerp at yahoo dot com to get in. Or they can enter by commenting on the blog posting.

The NPP Committee draws the bracket. It is done in a super secret location, where full concentration can be given to the fairness and accuracy of said draw – in between lap dances.

People comment on the site or thru email to schedule their match. Faldo makes tourney on PS and emails the passwords to the players for the match.

Players can set their own price for the match, but the NPP standard for the first 4 rounds will be $1.20. Emails ONLY confirming a different entry fee must be received from each player - by Faldo - before Faldo will make it something different.

As the matches get completed, Faldo updates with a new post. Players are responsible for reading the site, finding their next opponent, getting contact information from Faldo, and making sure the correct results are posted.

Faldo has forfeit power for lack of response or delay of play – even if he is in tourney. [Ed. Note: heh-heh-heh!]

Eligible players is anyone who played at least one round at NPP during the season.
[Ed. Note: Yeah, ok. But ‘seniority’ might be a consideration taken in order to make the bracket manageable. Doubt it, but possible.]

The tournament should try to be completed before new league season begins.” - Nahanni74

Faldo’s secretary did a fine job of drafting the tourney rules. Get your entry in by commenting here – or better still – writing Faldo at npokerp at yahoo dot com.

Number of entries allowed and the cut off point for entries is solely in the discretion of the NPP Tournament Committee….or “Tiffany” - if she is working the night of the draw.

Sunday, December 06, 2009

T3chlady and LittleRedElf Reach a Final Table

Notes are from T3chlady. No input from LRE. LRE must be doing a Bryson.

“Went to the American Legion Tournament in Dexter on Saturday and was surprised to see LRE! We ended up at the final table (a 16 person tournament).

I lost one major hand with 44 on the board and a 4 in hand. My opponent also had a 4, better kicker.

Later I had KK against AJ. Ace on the river. I was still in the game but was seriously short stacked at that point.

Ended up 4th - on the bubble. LRE probably won. He was chip leader at that point.”

Thanks T3chlady. LittleRedElf, where is the …rest of the story?

Nice job by both of you in any case.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

If You Are Not Playing at NPP on Tuesdays, You Just Might Be….

A little take-off of on the – “you just might be a redneck” - tagline of Jeff Foxworthy.

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be…

Hen-pecked
– definition from the Urban Dictionary - When a male complies with every single demand of his girlfriend or wife, and the female is in complete control of her man.

A hen-pecked male will easily bow to his woman and blow off his friends.
Also see Pussy-whipped.

Context:
Bigbrimar: “Damn. 4Putt blew us off again for golf and poker to go get bossed around. He's so hen-pecked.”
Faldo: (Makes whipping sound) “Yeah, he's whipped.”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be….

Pussy-whipped
- definition from common sense – When a male will do anything in order to possibly get lucky that evening….or in the case of a married guy, that week or month.

Context:
LittleRedElf: “Cigar4john can’t play poker tonight. He is going to his sister-in-laws baby shower after party, and watching the kids to save a few hours of baby-sitter hours.”

ThePunk75: “Is he whipped or what?”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be a....

Sitzpinkler
- directly translated from German as - "a man who urinates whilst sitting down"; refers to a man who is hen-pecked or under the thumb of his wife/girlfriend, or is otherwise weak or effeminate.

Context:
Absea98: “Is Whilden coming down to the poker room later?”
Kensik: “What, are you kidding? You know he's a total sitzpinkler these days.”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be a ….

Bryson
- definition from Great Britain - A hen-pecked, lightweight person. One who cannot handle their drinks and falls asleep easily.

Context:
Roll-call: 7Jokers, Beerhog, Boother36, Hlam14, and Greggst49 are not playing at NPP tonight – they are staying in with the wives and doing a Bryson.

Editor’s note: All names used in the ‘context’ descriptions were pulled - at random - from the thousands of male names used on the planet Earth and therefore are not to be taken literally if you know anyone who goes by these names. - Thank you

Friday, December 04, 2009

Douge2’s Humor Corner – XXVIII

Golfers are Compassionate

A husband and wife are on the 9th green, when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack! "Help me dear," she groans to her husband.

The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes picks up his putter and lines up his putt. His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him. "I'm dying here and you're putting?"

"Don't worry dear," says the husband calmly, "They found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you."
"Well, how long will it take for him to get here," she asks feebly?
"No time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through."

Lesson Learned

A young man and a priest are playing together. At a short par 3 the priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole my son?”

The young man says, "An 8-iron, father. How about you?"
The priest says, "I'm going to hit a soft seven and pray.”
The young man hits his 8-iron and puts the ball on the green. The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.
The young man says, "I don't know about you father, but in my church, when we pray, we keep our head down

Take a Mulligan or Two

Police are called to an apartment and find Erin Woods holding a bloody 5-iron standing over an unconscious Tiger. The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"
"Yes" says the woman.
"Did you hit him with that golf club?"
"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her, hands on her face.
"How many times did you hit him?"
"I don't know, five, six, maybe seven times.....just put me down for a five."

What is Par for this Hole?

A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between two trees he thought he could hit through. Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball hit a tree, bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.

As he approached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter asked, "Are you a good golfer?"
The man replied: "Got here in two, didn't I?"

Time Management at its Finest

The bride was escorted down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.

She said: "What are your golf clubs doing here?”
He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all day, is it?"

Thursday, December 03, 2009

You Can’t Be Nice All the Time in Poker

{Re-write by Faldo - Story is now correct. It was an obvious collusion situation, and not a collusion and dealer error situation that I originally wrote. The Premier Poker Lounge dealer was innocent. Faldo's error on that.}

Yes, take bad beats gracefully. The money will return with interest eventually.
NEVER berate a bad play by a player that costs you a pot. You want to chase Faldo away and have Boother36 or LittleRedElf fill the seat? Yeah – real smart.
The dealer screws up the deal and starts over ….and you had AA. Shut up and throw them in without any whining. No need to embarrass the dealer. It happens.

However, there are times when you have to stand firm and stick up for yourself and what is right. Here is a debacle at Premier Poker Lounge that needs to be reviewed. I will let Boother36 tell it.

“This is a situation that happened to me on Saturday night – the big Saturday weekend at PPL - that I wanted to share with the NPP crew so it doesn’t happen to you!!

Here are the facts; a $110 buy-in tourney, 28 players to start, we are down to the bubble with 4, they pay thru 3rd ($1250, $775, $520), antes/blinds = $400/$2K/$4K, average chip stack is $87,500, all 4 players are between $60K and $95K in chips.

The 2 big stacks clash on a hand and leave the loser with only $1K. I am sitting good with around $75K, so it appears that I am a lock to cash.

The next hand, the short stack who I will call Yappy (he is a dealer in another local charity card room, a twenty-something self proclaimed poker expert-just ask him, and he NEVER shut his trap once during the entire tourney!!) is UTG and calls for his remaining chip.

The button folds. The SB (who happens to be Yappy’s buddy!!) [Ed. Note: Red Flag!] goes all in for around $60K. I’m in the BB and can’t believe this move. I would have expected him to simply flat call so we could check-it down and have 2 shots at taking out bubble-boy. I fold in disgust, to see the SB w/ As7s and Yappy with 85 off suit. [Ed. Note: Ok, not smart, but not the worst play I have seen in this situation.]

Now for the nutty part. The flop comes 8-5-3. Yappy's buddy picks up his cards (As 7s), turns them over, says “I fold” and throws them into the muck. No one at the table, including the dealer, can believe this move. Then the dealer deals the turn (A) and the river (A) and shoves the pot to Yappy, as he has to.

Everyone, except for Yappy and his buddy, can’t believe what happened. [Ed. Note: I would like a little more info on who "Everyone" was. How many people saw this - and why didn't they call the Floor Supervisor? This is obvious collusion between Yappy and YB.]

The Floor Supervisor is no where to be seen (which is odd for the PPL). And after some small talk along the lines of WTF….play continues.

Here is where I made my mistake. I decide to let it go. I don’t want to delay the game, make waves or be a “bad guy” to wreck my karma. I decide since Yappy only has a few thousand in chips, he will be out in the next hand and all will be back to normal.

Wrong!! He proceeds to double up and take down the next few pots. Soon we find ourselves at break and Yappy has around $30K!! (Never doubt the old saying “a chip and a chair”!!)

When break is over, the table starts chatting about chopping ($1K cash for the chip leader and $500 of the other 3 of us). I say “I’m not comfortable with Yappy getting any cash, since he should be gone”, so we don’t chop and play continues.

The first hand after break, I have A9 and move all in. Yappy calls with A7 and the others fold. Now I am feeling comfortable that all is well in the world – I will bust Yappy and things will be back to normal. Well, as you guessed it, a 7 comes on the river and now Yappy has more chips than I do!! Talk about WTF!!!

I decide to suck up my pride and agree to chop. I walk out the door with $500, basically 3rd place money.

After spending time lying awake in bed early on Sunday morning thinking about what went wrong….next time, I will ask to stop play when the “collusion” situation happened, regardless of who it pissed off or how much time it would have taken to get things straightened out.

But I guess I’m too much of a nice guy to do that. So the moral of the story is don’t be a nice guy and let something that is not right, slide by…it could come back to hurt you!!!”

Boother, glad you are a nice guy. You are too big (size and heart) to be otherwise!

What is wrong with the guy on the Button? I would have reported the collusion to the Floor Supervisor myself! The missing Floor Supervisor is another concern. That just should not happen. It's the final table and pay time!

I like everyone at PPL, and it is still my local poker room of choice, but I hope we can get the House and the Dealer side of this collusion story. I will ask.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Theedouble*d Wins His 4th NPP Tourney!

It was a crazy night of poker as the battle for the final seats really set the tone. Even though we only had 18 starters, we almost set a record for the longest tourney. That is a testament to the quality of players in this league and the importance they place on doing well in it.

I am a proud commissioner I must say. Double-D fought his way past all the people trying to reach where he is – an NPP 2009 Finalist.

ThePunk75 locked down his seat tonight, clinching the 4th quarter seat. Only the two Total Point at-Large seats remain to be claimed – and that is going down to the wire!

Next week is the last week of the regular season. What a league!

On to the action:

30 min: A short-stacked (SS) Birdy333 (18th) goes with (QT) but can’t catch Derf-63’s (AQ).
41 min: A SS K9isadog (17th) tries with the same hand (QT), but Akensi has (88).
Look at the time! Forty minutes and only two players are out. But there are plenty of short-stacks ‘hannnngggging around’. It goes wild until break time now.
48 min: Absea98’s (77) takes out a short-stacked (SS) Tomservo2 (16th).
49 min: Last week’s winner Jenski6 (15th) goes with (KJ) but LittleRedElf is holding (99).

50 min: A SS T3chlady (14th) gets all-in with (As 5s) but Akensi holds (AJ).
52 min: A SS Funtoon (13th) has to go with (9c 5c) but Bigbrimar has (TT).
53 min: BigDaddyTman (12th) sees his (77) run into Absea98’s (JJ).

Finally, a little calm for the scribe!

1st Break:
Bigbrimar 5650
Absea98 4395
Derf-63 3455
Douge2 3405
Theedouble*d 2510
Kensik 1740
Akensi 1625
ThePunk75 1465
LittleRedElf 1315
Rennzzo 1080
Tigercub8189 360

63 min: A SS Tigercub8189 (11th) is executed by Kensik’s two pair.
66 min: A SS Rennzzo’s (10th) (AK) runs into ThePunk75’s (77).
70 min: A SS Akensi (9th) loses to Theedouble*d’s (88).
85 min: A SS LittleRedElf (8th) with (A9) runs into Bigbrimar’s (QQ).
89 min: A SS Derf-63 (7th) has to go with (22), but Kensik pairs holding (AJ).

115 min: A now SS Bigbrimar (6th) bluffs at a rag flop with (A6) but Theedouble*d’ paired his 8’s.

116 min: A SS Kensik (5th) has to try with (Q2) and runs into Absea98’s (A2).

If you have not noticed, everyone is going out short-stacked. No one wants to go out when the final precious points are available for the At-Large seats in the NPP Finals. It’s point or wait until next year – and everyone was holding on as long as possible.

All but two players exited short-stacked! WHAT??? No one read Allinduce's article I posted on here a couple days ago?

As Sparky Anderson said when his rookie pinch-runner didn't steal second when they were conceding the base - "If they don't want to go, nobody's going to stop them."

2nd break (120 min):
Absea98 11745
Theedouble*d 7600
ThePunk75 4890
Douge2 2765

137 min: (Seventeen minutes later!) ThePunk75 loses with (As7s) to Douge2’s (AK) to get crippled.

140 min: ThePunk75 (4th) goes out after a battle, finally losing when his (KJ) gets run down by Theedouble*d’s (KT) with a [T] on the turn.

147 min: Absea98 (3rd) goes with (Kh Th), but Douge2 has (JJ).
Heads up: Douge2 15,300 - Theedouble*d 11,700

148 min: Heads up: Douge2 10,000 - Theedouble*d 17,000
150 min: Heads up: Douge2 18,600 - Theedouble*d 8,400
155 min: Heads up: Douge2 5,300 - Theedouble*d 21,700

What is going on here?????

160 min: Heads up: Douge2 20,200 - Theedouble*d 6,800
165 min: Heads up: Douge2 15,800 - Theedouble*d 11,200

After reading this – I expect everyone to enter the NPP Heads up Tourney! Talk about excitement!

You have to play in at least ONE NPP league tourney to be eligible. Word up to all who have the password but have not thrown down yet. Next week is it!

166 min: Douge2 (2nd) goes with (KJ), but Theedouble*d’s (A9) hold up. Then Doug’s (J9) loses to DD’s (A4). A great heads up match!

Congratulations to Theedouble*d on his 4th win and ThePunk75 for clinching the 4th quarter seat! Theedouble*d also moves even with ThePunk on the Walk of Fame!

1st – Theedouble*d
2nd – Douge2
3rd – Absea98
4th – ThePunk75
5th – Kensik
6th – Bigbrimar
7th – Derf-63
8th – LittleRedElf
9th – Akensi

Standings are on the right side of the blog.
Four players are still in the running for the last two seats.

Absea98 - 132 points
Douge2 – 123 points
Kensik - 117 points
Rennzzo – 113 points
Tigercub8189 - 111 pts

Tension in the Big House!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Government Delays Compliance Date for Implementation of the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act

The Federal Reserve and U.S. American Treasury announced on Friday that implementation of the UIGEA has been postponed from December 1, 2009 until June 1, 2010.

From a statement:

"Agencies Extend Compliance Date for Final Rule to Implement Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act

The Department of the Treasury and the Federal Reserve Board on Friday announced the release of a joint final rule to extend the compliance date for their joint regulation implementing certain provisions of the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act by six months to June 1, 2010."

Well, you can keep those bank accounts open another six months. Some of our freedoms got a ‘pardon’ from the communists running our nation.

Don’t worry however. The plan to destroy the rest of our freedoms goes on around the clock in Washington, your state capital, your media outlets and the schools.

Just work, have a beer and fund your poker accounts. It will all be over soon.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Theedouble*d Scores a Tourney Win at Northville Downs!

I will let him tell the story, since he did so entertainingly:

“First I played Thursday night in a $35 dollar qualifier for a Sunday Deep Stack tournament seat. They gave out six $200 seats and 7th place got $101. I managed to dodge the bubble and got the $101. I paid the $99 and bought the seat for Sunday. (- $134)

I then entered the Friday afternoon qualifier for $35. (- $169...This isn't sounding so good. I could of nearly just bought into this thing.) This was a much smaller tourney than the night one and they only gave out 1 $225 seat for Sunday and 2nd place got $196.

Again I ducked the bubble and scored the $196. What the heck...I already bought my seat right? (+$27 That's more like it...Now I have my seat for free and have some pocket change. At least I am back in the black.)

Sunday at 2:00pm came and I began to see cards for the real tourney. Wow! Were they bad! Not playing was just the best I could do. First break came and found me sitting a little below my initial 10K in chips.

I looked for my friend who is a much better player than I am, and he was gone. I had just looked over at him 5 minutes before break. Now his seat had no chips in front of it. Bummer. How can I hope to last if I can't get a card and even he can't get by the break monster? {Ed. Note: Only on-line has a break monster]

Cards flew again and they were just as bad. The new dealer was no help at all. I was able to knock a few small ones off and 2nd break found me around 11K and very frustrated. "Patience", I said. But I really just wanted to kill something. It was a very good thing this tourney had a high patience factor in the structure or I'd of been dead meat.

I thought for sure that another new dealer and this long into the game, I must surely catch some cards. I was wrong. Ten minutes from 3rd break and I had about 8K. Then came the magic. They replaced my dealer to give him a break early. My frustration had been mounting as the new guy sat down.

The first cards he dealt me were 22 and I was on the button. Now I had seen plenty of 2's but never together in the same hand. I had a guy in middle position throw a healthy raise out and I lost it. I AM NOT LAYING DOWN ANOTHER HAND!, I thought to myself. I justified my silliness by thinking, if he is on a steal and I raise he will let me have it. So I re-raised him. He was ticked. He went all in.

Did I mention that I was not gonna lay down another hand? I called. He had AJ of hearts. I thought I might lay that down if someone reraised me. Guess he was frustrated too. He had about $800 more chips than me and if he hit I was going home. Flop came Kh 9H 5c. GREAT! Now he had the flush draw to go with it. Turn and river hit air. My 22 held! I had chips! [Ed. Note: The essence of tourney poker – you have to win these coin flips!]

Next hand I catch As3s. Did I mention I have chips. I limp and the small blind bumps it up. Duh. I call. Flop comes A 3 J rainbow. Small blind with bigger stack than me goes all in. I announce that I have to call as I shove all my chips in again. His A Q can't catch up and I double again. Third break came and I was a force.

For the rest of the night I got nothing but love. Pocket pairs galore and strong aces. The last 3 dealers I had loved me as much as the first 3 had despised me. I hit nearly every time I went to flop. When I missed - I just laid down. No bluffing needed.

1st place promised $4,029. I was eyeing the prize. I went to final table as chip leader. 2 guys went out and then we were 8, We all pitched in $42 bucks for the guy going out on the bubble, ( -$15 I am back in the red again...LOL) so he could have his buy in back and then we were 7. 2 more guys went down and with 5 guys left some one suggested a chip count chop. I was holding 35% of the chips and was dominant leader. I said "How much will that give me?" When they said $3621, I said, "DO IT!" [twss]

We all know how precarious a position chip leader is at a final table. If I said no, I would of played for about $400 more dollars and stood to get $2500 for second. Can you say, "No brainer"?

Some tips for my 3 favorite dealers and I am out the door in the black with $3,546. Want to know what the first 3 dealers got? LOL”

Theedouble*d

Congratulations to the DD! Another NPP playyaaa! Twss.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Brian “Allinduces” of Premier Poker, With Great Tourney Advice

“Dear Faldo,

I'm just adding a little tid-bit to your blind structure post. Maybe some of you already know this, and maybe some of you don't. I guess I'm just going to let you into my world of poker.

First thing’s first. It is nearly impossible to win a tournament with a bad blind structure without "lady luck" on your side. Now let's flip the script and talk about a good blind structure.

Just a little disagreement comes to mind on the "PF" (Patient Factor). Yes, as we all know patience is our friend, and every winning poker player needs it in their game.

However there comes a time in a tournament that if you are getting close to "blinding out", I'm sorry to inform, you are playing tournament poker all wrong.
Yes we all have heard the age old saying "but I'm card dead"....Yes, that can happen...cards go cold, we feel like all we are doing is blinding/ante to death!

We as poker players we sit down at a table to create an image, a somewhat of a persona that we build on, and work with. START USING IT PLAYERS!

Here is another factor. It's called the "M" factor and every tournament player should be using it. You know the age old "10x BB start pushing" Well folks, it's long before 10x.

Let's take for example: 9 handed table blinds are 200/400 50 ante. (I forgot to mention the M factor is used in tourneys with antes) you have a stack size of 10,000.

Yes to most it might seem like a lot..but let me tell you it's not. Here is the breakdown.

9 players x 50 (ante) = 450----(dead money) in the center
SB= 200
BB= 400

Now. add it all up you get....1050. Divide your stack size by 1050. So our 10,000 stack has an "M" of 9.5. Anytime you have an "M" of under 10 you are in somewhat of a shove mode.

It's about your opponents opening range of hands vs his stack size and yours compared to how well your hand holds up vs that range.

At these stages of a tournament cards are thrown out the window, and it all comes down to pure math, stack sizes, and M. Wait...let me re phrase that. In LATE stages of a tournament cards are thrown out the window...with that stack size of 10,000 at a 200/400 level your probably thinking well that's 25 BBs.

Well, throw the ante into effect and now it's a whole new ballgame...if your a true player in these situations squeeze plays, etc. Work wonders! You can't win a tournament without winning a race. Also you can't win a tournament without coming from behind either...take all this into consideration next time your playing a tournament and your about to blind off. Don't be afraid to stick in that stack. Even in a good structure you can't wait for premium hands all the time..

Next thing I like...the Gus Hansen theory on Ante to Small Blind Ratio.”
Thanks Brian for a great article.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Matchy’s Home Game Shows the NPP Spirit

Here is the write up for Matchy’s game last Saturday, compliments of JimF of Schwin Poker:

“Four of us showed up to play so Mrs. Matchy was recruited to play. The games were mixed, Omaha, Hold 'em and 7-Stud.

The players: Matchy, The Lovely and Talented Matchy, JimF, Arctic1Blast, and Tim(not 7Jokers-747).

The outcome: The Matchy’s clean up, Tim doesn't have a fold button, Greg, well, he's Greg, - and Farrell gets screwed by a bunch of fish! (not you Faldo, only cause you were not there!)”

Wish I was, now that I know even fish like me can take Jim's money!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Faldo's Gift to His Readers on Thanksgiving!

The true story of Thanksgiving!

History revisionism is not something that’s been going on since outcome based education. It’s been going on for quite a while.

The false story of Thanksgiving can be summed up very quickly. The Pilgrims came from England to escape oppression. They arrived in a new land and were immediately overwhelmed with their own incompetence as human beings. They couldn’t grow food. They couldn’t feed themselves. They couldn’t protect themselves. They had no clue what to do.

Our schools and the media have obliterated the contributions of America’s earliest permanent settlers, the Pilgrims. Why? Because they were people inspired by profound religious beliefs and overcame incredible odds.

Today, public schools are simply not teaching how important the religious dimension was in shaping our history and our nation’s character. Whether teachers are just uncomfortable with this material or whether there’s been a concerted effort to cover up the truth, the results are the same. Kids are no longer learning enough to understand and appreciate how and why America was created.

The story of the Pilgrims begins in the early part of the seventeenth century. The Church of England under King James I was persecuting anyone and everyone who did not recognize its absolute civil and spiritual authority. Those who challenged ecclesiastical authority and those who believed strongly in freedom of worship were hunted down, imprisoned, and sometimes executed for their beliefs. A group of separatists first fled to Holland and established a community.

After eleven years, about forty of them agreed to make a perilous journey to the New World, where they would certainly face hardships, but could live and worship God according to the dictates of their own consciences. On August 1, 1620, the Mayflower set sail.

It carried a total of 102 passengers, including forty Pilgrims led by William Bradford. On the journey, Bradford set up an agreement, a contract that established just and equal laws for all members of the new community, irrespective of their religious beliefs. Where did the revolutionary ideas expressed in the Mayflower Compact come from? From the Bible.

The Pilgrims were a people completely steeped in the lessons of the Old and New Testaments. They looked to the ancient Israelites for their example. And, because of the biblical precedents set forth in Scripture, they never doubted that their experiment would work. But this was no pleasure cruise, friends.

The journey to the New World was a long and arduous one. And when the Pilgrims landed in New England in November, they found, according to Bradford’s detailed journal, a cold, barren, desolate wilderness. There were no friends to greet them, he wrote. There were no houses to shelter them. There were no inns where they could refresh themselves. And the sacrifice they had made for freedom was just beginning.

During the first winter, half the Pilgrims – including Bradford’s own wife – died of starvation, sickness or exposure. When spring finally came, Indians taught the settlers how to plant corn, fish for cod and skin beavers for coats. Life improved for the Pilgrims, but they did not yet prosper!

This is important to understand because this is where modern American history lessons often end. Thanksgiving is actually explained in some textbooks as a holiday for which the Pilgrims gave thanks to the Indians for saving their lives, rather than as a devout expression of gratitude grounded in the tradition of both the Old and New Testaments.

Here is the part that has been omitted: The original contract the Pilgrims had entered into with their merchant-sponsors in London called for everything they produced to go into a common store, and each member of the community was entitled to one common share. All of the land they cleared and the houses they built belong to the community as well.

Bradford, who had become the new governor of the colony, recognized that this form of collectivism was as costly and destructive to the Pilgrims as that first harsh winter, which had taken so many lives.

He decided to take bold action. Bradford assigned a plot of land to each family to work and manage, thus turning loose the power of the marketplace. That’s right. Long before Karl Marx was even born, the Pilgrims had discovered and experimented with what could only be described as socialism. And what happened?

It didn’t work! Surprise, surprise, huh? What Bradford and his community found was that the most creative and industrious people had no incentive to work any harder than anyone else, unless they could utilize the power of personal motivation!

But while most of the rest of the world has been experimenting with socialism for well over a hundred years – trying to refine it, perfect it, and re-invent it – the Pilgrims decided early on to scrap it permanently. What Bradford wrote about this social experiment should be in every schoolchild’s history lesson.

If it were, we might prevent much needless suffering in the future.

Here now, in its entirety, the William Bradford journal, what he wrote about the social experiment after abandoning what essentially was socialism shortly after the Pilgrims had arrived in the United States or in the new world:

“The experience that we had in this common course and condition, tried sundry years…that by taking away property, and bringing community into a common wealth, would make them happy and flourishing – as if they were wiser than God," Bradford wrote.

"For this community [so far as it was] was found to breed much confusion and discontent, and retard much employment that would have been to their benefit and comfort. For young men that were most able and fit for labor and service did repine that they should spend their time and strength to work for other men’s wives and children without any recompense…that was thought injustice."

Do you hear what he was saying, ladies and gentlemen? The Pilgrims found that people could not be expected to do their best work without incentive.

So what did Bradford’s community try next? They harnessed the power of good old free enterprise by invoking the under girding capitalistic principle of private property. "Every family was assigned its own plot of land to work and permitted to market its own crops and products."

Not just use themselves and not just send to a common store but they could market. They could grow as much, they could sell it for what they could get for it, and the incentive was clear to do as much as possible on both sides.

And what was the result? "This had very good success," wrote Bradford, "For it made all hands industrious, so as much more corn was planted than otherwise would have been."

Bradford doesn’t sound like much of a Obama-maniac, does he? Is it possible that supply-side economics could have existed before the 1980s? Yes.

Read the story of Joseph and Pharaoh in Genesis 41. Following Joseph’s suggestion (Gen 41:34), Pharaoh reduced the tax on Egyptians to 20% during the ’seven years of plenty’ and the ‘Earth brought forth in heaps.’ (Gen. 41:47)

In no time, the Pilgrims found they had more food than they could eat themselves. So they set up trading posts and exchanged goods with the Indians. The profits allowed them to pay off their debts to the merchants in London.

And the success and prosperity of the Plymouth settlement attracted more Europeans and began what came to be known as the ‘Great Puritan Migration.’ Now, let me ask you: Have you read this history before? Is this lesson being taught to your children today? If not, why not?

Nevertheless, the Pilgrims and the Puritans of early New England are often vilified today as witch burners and portrayed as simpletons. But to the contrary, it was their commitment to pluralism and free worship that led to these ideals being incorporated into American history, and our history books purposely conceal the fact that these notions were developed by communities of devout Christians who studied the Bible and found that it prescribes limited representative government and free enterprise as the best political and economic systems. Now, there’s only one word for this, folks. It’s censorship.

That’s what’s being taught today. What is not being taught today is the devotion to God that these people had, but the failure of a socialist compact to adequately provide for the residents of the first colony and how William Bradford himself saw it was failing almost from the outset and devised a new compact which was basically capitalism and unfettered competition, and incentive, and then it was Katie bar the door.

All of these things are part of the original Thanksgiving, and even when I go back and remember my days in school, I was not taught this. I was not taught the involvement and the references to God.

I was not taught that the Pilgrims had all this bounty after awhile and shared it with the Indians. It was quite the opposite. The purpose of teaching Thanksgiving when I was a kid was to tell all of us just how wonderful the Indians were and how well they treated us when we arrived because we were basically inept and incompetent.

I enjoy passing this story along every Thanksgiving, and it always reaches new people. Every year I do it, people who have never heard it before are amazed. Now, if I was able to find it and get the true story, it’s out there, but it’s not in conventional history textbooks that you’ll find in many of the public schools.

Hat tip to Rush Limbaugh.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Jenski6 Wins Her 1st NPP Tourney!

She becomes the 47th tournament winner on NPP, and the 4th lady to do so. She now joins Nahanni74, Nixi44 and UMichpoker as the girls that “beat the boys’ at their own game.

Jen did not do it easily as she had to take out runaway point leader LittleRedElf – heads up - to win it all over fourteen other players.

We had one new player join us tonight - Ksloflyer – and Davethedog returned to the NPP felt for his annual donation …er, visit. A possible new player – Owetheshark – stopped by to watch the action. And old-timer Cigar4john also sweatered the Dog. Nice to see you all.

On to the action:

16 min: T3chlady (15th) continues to be cold-decked in our league for some reason. She has to go with (As Js) with a flop of [5AA], but she finds Funtoon holding (55). Ouch!

21 min: Derf-63 (14th) gets all-in with (A3) and a board of [JQA]. BigDaddyTman had the (KT).

28 min: Ksloflyer (13th) sees his trip queens lose to Funtoon’s full house. This is a typical NPP welcome to new players.

34 min: Tomservo2 (12th) sees his (K4) and a flop with a [K] in it, run into Rennzzo’s (KJ).

54 min: Davethedog (11th) got no nub in his return as his (QQ) (69%) first lose to LittleRedElf’s (AQ) (30%) and then Dave’s (QJ) loses to LRE’s (K9) to close him out.

1st Break:

Funtoon 5885
ThePunk75 4910
LittleRedElf 3230
BigDaddyTman 1805
Jenski6 1720
Birdy333 1195
Absea98 1070
Rennzzo 995
Budda627 935
Tigercub8189 755

62 min: A short-stacked (SS) Birdy333 (10th) goes with (KJ) and loses the coin flip to Tigercub8189’s (TT).

66 min: Rennzzo (9th) moves in with (KK), but LittleRedElf holds (AA). Ouch!
69 min: Absea98 (8th) loses his coin flip with (55) to ThePunk75’s (Kh Th).
71 min: BigDaddyTman (7th) has to go with (84) and a board of [4JJ4], but Jenski6 is holding (J2). A true double blind hand special!

76 min: A SS Tigercub8189 (6th) goes with (77) and loses his coin flip to ThePunk75’s (AK), with a [K] on the flop.

80 min: After first getting carved up by Funtoon, ThePunk75 (5th) has to try with (Ad 8d) and runs into Jenski6’s (AK).

81 min: Budda627 (4th) goes with (A8) (56%), but LittleRedElf’s (QJ) (43%) nails a flop of [QQ7]!

97 min: Funtoon (3rd) goes with (55) after a non-scary flop of [96T], but Jenski6 has (T6).

100 min: Heads up: Jenski6 16,500 - LittleRedElf 6,000

105 min: LittleRedElf (2nd) has to try with (A5) (30%), but Jenski6’s (TT) (70%) hold up!

Congratulations to Jenski6 on a special achievement!

1st – Jenski6
2nd – LittleRedElf
3rd – Funtoon
4th – Budda627
5th – ThePunk75
6th – Tigercub8189
7th – BigDaddyTman
8th – Absea98
9th – Rennzzo

Standings are on the right side of the blog. Three players are still in the running for the 4th quarter seat - and 10 remain in contention for the two Total Points Seats for the NPP Finals. Good luck to all!

Boother36 Reports on His Outstanding Showing in the Heartland Poker Tour

Take it away Boother36:

“All in all, it was even better the second time around!!! It was a huge mine field to navigate through, so I feel fortunate to have made it back to the final table. While I wish the outcome would have been different, looking back I really am lucky to have made that far again.

We started play at 5:00 PM on Saturday night with 296 players and played till about 11:30 PM. That got us down to 82 players.

The average chip stack was about $50K at that time and I had $81K. Not too bad for the end of day 1. Ken and Gary (from my poker club) were up there playing in the tourney too. The 3 of us made a KILLING on a BJ table late Saturday night. But that’s a story for a different day!! (Ed. Note: Got to hear that one! Faldo can’t win at blackjack if I got 20 every time.)

Play resumed at 9:00 AM on Sunday. Steady, conservative, tight play got me into the money at 30 players. My cards turned dead shortly thereafter and I was able to fold my way from 25th or so to the final table. We ended up playing for almost 2 hours with 9 players. My demise came about when I went after stealing the monumental antes and blinds ($4K/$30K/$60K).

I had Js10s in middle position. I went all in for just over $400K (ave chip stack was $495K at that time). Of course, the SS had to have AJ and called. Nothing hit my hand and I ended up losing about 2/3rds of my chips on that hand.

The very next hand I got KsQs and went all in again for about $140K. Play folded around to the BB (the 2nd chip leader), and after properly analyzing that he should call my “barely more than min raise amount” with any 2 cards, he did so. He had Kd2c. Even though I had him dominated, as luck would have it a 2 comes on the river!! Just like that, I was out (9th - $10,588).

With this run of luck I have had at this venue, I can’t wait for the HPT to get back to the Soaring Eagle!!”

Thanks Boother, for the report. And again, great job!

For those of you that have never been there, The Soaring Eagle Casino in Mt. Pleasant has always ran a nice poker room. Faldo and Thai Food haunted that place profitably for years. Then, just before the Chris Moneymaker boom, they closed the poker room.

Excuse me for the joke, but the Indians timing on that was worse than Colonel Custard. They had a great poker room, clientele and experienced dealers. But decided they would make more money with more slots (probably true).

Then – BANG! They had to rebuild it. I played there a few times after the re-start, but it was not the same or as busy. But it is obvious it is back now – and better than ever.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Boother36 Finishes 9th in the 2009 Heartland Poker Tour Mt. Pleasant Event!

That is back to back final table 9th place finishes for Boother36 in this prestigious event. Wow!

The total prize pool was $426,528, and 297 players in the Main Event. Boother battled thru them all for the second year in a row to make yet another final table, and take home $10,588.

I think…hell, I know it is a much greater feat to make back to back final tables, than it is to win one and never be heard from again.

Congratulations to Boother36! I hope he sends me some key hands to post.

Douge2’s Humor Corner – XXVII

Devine Intervention Required

"Anyone with needs to be prayed over, come forward, to the front at the altar," the Preacher says.

ThePunk75 gets in line, and when it's his turn, the preacher asks: "Punk, what do you want me to pray about for you?"

The Punk replies: "Preacher, I need you to pray for my hearing."

The preacher puts one finger in The Punk’s ear, and he places the other hand on top of The Punk's head and prays and prays and prays, he prays a blue streak for The Punk.

After a few minutes, the Preacher removes his hands, stands back and asks, "Punk, how is your hearing now?"

The Punk says, "I don't know, Reverend, it ain't til next Wednesday!"

A Free Pointer

Duder1123 met Helen while on vacation, and Duder fell head over heels 'in love' with her and after a couple of weeks during which Duder took Helen out to various dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, etc. He was convinced that it was true love.

And so....on the last night of his vacation, the two of them went to dinner and had a serious talk about how the relationship would continue.

"It's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut," Duder said to his newfound lady friend. '"I eat, sleep and breathe golf so if that's going to be a problem, say so now!”

Helen took a deep breath and responded: “Since we're being honest with each other, here goes ... You need to know that I'm a hooker.”

“I see”, Duder replied. “That is a problem, for sure.” He spent some time looking down at the table, deep in thought.

Then he added, "You know, it's probably because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you tee off.”

Sunday, November 22, 2009

The Blind Struture of a Tournament is an Important Factor

There is a term called “The Patience Factor” (PF) in tournament poker. It is the time it takes for a player to get blinded out if they never play a hand.

The concept is, the faster you would get blinded out – based on the blind levels and how fast they go up – the FASTER you have to play the tournament.

In other words, if you buy into tournament (not that I would recommend it) and you get 2000 chips – and the blinds start at 250 – 500 and go up every 5 minutes – you may want to open your starting hand selection a little. Ok, a lot! You just won’t have time to wait for AA, read players or establish an image. The blinds will take your chips. It will basically be bingo poker and may the best hand win.

If you buy into a tourney with a starting with 2000 chips and the blinds start at 1 – 2 and go up every half hour, then you have found a poker tournament where skill will be much more of a factor.

Let us take a look at the tourney structure at the Premier Poker Lounge where NPP recently held our get together:

Blinds increase every 15 minutes and you start with 7000 chips:
25 – 50
50 – 100
75 – 150
100 – 200
200 – 400 50 ante
300 – 600 75 ante
400 – 800 100 ante
500 – 1000 100 ante
1000 – 2000 200 ante (the most patient player just went broke in 2 hours, 6 minutes)

I won’t bore you with the math, but this calculates to a PF of 4.23 – which translates into a Skill Level for the tournament of 2.5 out of 6, with “Six” being the tournament where poker skill would be a more prevalent factor.

As a measure stick, lets look at our Tuesday tourney on PokerStars. On-line tourneys use a different scale since the hands are dealt so much faster. We start with 1500 in chips, but the PF = 8.51 – which translates into a 4.4 skill level.

Keep the blind structure in mind before plunking down your money for a tournament. Be aware whether you should be in more of a gamble mode or is there time allowed for play. There is no “bad” or “good”, unless you prefer one or the other. But you better adjust your play based on the PF.

Are you LISTENING Faldo?

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Boother Returns to the Heartland Poker Tour

This last weekend, Boother36 played in a qualifier for the Heartland Poker Tournament held this weekend at the Soaring Eagle Casino in Mt. Pleasant. He got it done!

Now Boother returns to the tournament where he had a final table appearance in the past (posting in CardPlayer Magazine).

The Main Event tournament starts on Saturday at 5pm at the "Eagle".

Boother, good luck and take care of those mopes!

Remember, "Friends don't let friends play poker like Faldo."

Bigbrimar Scores Two Final Tables in Two Days

Bigbrimar is on a roll! He picks up a 2nd and a 7th place finish, back to back in the PokerStars 360 player SNG tourneys.

Anyone who has played in them knows what a minefield they are. But at NPP – with the sharpshooters on this team – we all learn to “dodge bullets, baby!”

Nice job Bri.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

BigDaddyTman Wins in His 1st NPP Tourney!

He becomes the 46th tournament winner on NPP, and only the 7th to ever to win in his first tournament. I think we just added another thoroughbred to this already “lights out” league!

BigDaddy bested eighteen others, including our point leader, three Final Seat holders and two other new players; Birdy333 and MTSuper7. Welcome to NPP – all three of you.

As I watched the final table action, all I could think about was how good the poker being played was. It was strategically and mentally better played than the televised WSOP main event table. That is a fact!

On to the action:

17 min: Wingsfancurt (19th) gets no nub as his (Ad 8d) (54%) loses to Biglou93’s hand of (Ah 3h) (27%), when a [3] hits on the river.

28 min: Family pot odds forces Rennzzo (18th) to go when he hits his straight on the turn (JT), but Meatsword hits his full house (33) as kings’ pair on the river.

32 min: Midway2933 (17th) gets double-teamed by Meatsword and Tomservo2 and Tom hits his flush.

38 min: Derf-63 (16th) sees his flush lose to BigDaddyTman’s quad Aces!
40 min: K9isadog’s (15th) (AQ) can’t catch ThePunk75’s (99).

43 min: LittleRedElf (14th) semi-bluffs with (KJ) and a board of [75TQ] and his straight draw. But Funtoon can’t go anywhere with (T5) and the two pair hold up.

53 min: T3chlady (13th) sees her (AQ) (76%) lose on a flop of [QJ7] when Absea98 (20%) with (KJ) hits a [J] on the turn for trips. The Lady’s bad luck continues.

1st Break (Three new players make it! A record!):

Meatsword 4020
BigDaddyTman 3655
Jenski6 3410
Absea98 3300
ThePunk75 3125
Funtoon 2500
Tomservo2 2315
Birdy333 1850
Biglou93 1840
Budda627 930
Tigercub8189 790
MTSuper7 765

61 min: A short-stacked (SS) Budda627 (12th) sees his (A5) run into BigDaddyTman’s (AK).

62 min: A SS MTSuper7 (11th) sees his (KQ) run into Birdy333’s (AA).
75 min: A SS Biglou93 (10th) has to try when his (83) catches part of the flop, but BigDaddyTman flopped a straight. No nub for the short stacks so far.

79 min: A SS Funtoon (9th) moves in with (KQ), but can’t catch BigDaddyTman’s (AQ).
87 min: ThePunk75 (8th) loses with (99) as BigDaddyTman’s (Ad Jd) hits a [J] on the flop. That is five knockouts, and you know he is not done.

89 min: Birdy333 (7th) has to try with (A5), but runs into Meatsword’s (AK).
91 min: A SS Tigercub8189 (6th) goes with (A7), but Tomservo2 has (KK).
117 min: Meatsword (5th) cripples his stack as his (AQ) runs into Jenski6’s (KK), and he goes out by her hand soon after.

2nd break:
BigDaddyTman 11105 (rare air here for a newbie)
Jenski6 10951
Tomservo2 4069
Absea98 2375

140 min: We played a while after the break before Tomservo2 (4th) goes with (77), but BigDaddyTman has (QQ). Tman’s 6th knockout and he decides to club down #7 and #8 in short order.

141 min: Jenski6 (3rd) goes with (KQ), but BigDaddyTman has (KK).

142 min: No need to check the Heads Up chip totals as it was a run away. Absea98 (2nd) limps along with (T5) (92%) and nails a flop of [JTT]. BigDaddyTman tries to shove Absea off the hand with (93) (7%). Of course he calls.

But the turn-river is [87] and BigDaddyTman takes it down with a straight.

Congratulations to BigDaddyTman on a special achievement, and joining The Walk of Fame. And congratulations to Absea98, who has made the Total Points race for the last two NPP Final seats very interesting.

1st – BigDaddyTman
2nd – Absea98
3rd – Jenski6
4th – Tomservo2
5th – Meatsword
6th – Tigercub8189
7th – Birdy333 (well done – points in 1st NPP event)
8th – ThePunk75
9th – Funtoon

Standings are on the right side of the blog. In the interest of full disclosure - I am using the bracketed seat winners to show where the point cut-off is to win a seat in the finals. Not that it still is not fun to play, but FYI.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Faldo’s Advice Column for Women – part III

I get letters all the time asking for the time tested and true advice that can only be given by Faldo. Here is a sample of some of the letters I answer daily:

Dear Faldo,

My husband comes home from work on Fridays and absolutely refuses to do anything all weekend but watch the Cubs or the Lions on TV and lay around in the hammock he's got stretched between two trees over our patio next to the lawn.
What do you think of a man like that?

Signed,
Aggravated in Ferndale

Dear AIF,

You raise a myriad of troubling issues in one short sentence. First, how did a Ferndale man get hooked on the CUBS in the first place?! I don't know where to begin with that one. He's just asking for a lifetime of heartache and broken dreams! Of course, he is used to the pain, because of the f’ing Lions!

I'd recommend a good sports therapist immediately for this unhealthy addiction.

Next, why is the hammock strung over the patio instead of the lawn? This is a definite safety issue. I'd recommend installing a good, thick lawn such as Conquest sod turf, which will provide a comfy landing zone for those unfortunate summer time snoozing accidents.

Since your husband doesn't like to be disturbed on weekends, I recommend you do this during the week. Mornings are best, as the sod will take more readily with a little dew. Get yourself a sturdy pair of Wells-Lamont gardening gloves while you're at it, as they'll cut down on blisters.

Happy to help,
Faldo


Dear Faldo,

My husband, Matchy, has a mutual friend, Bill, whom I am also very close to. Recently, Bill tagged along with Matchy and his fishing buddy, BigBriMar, as they spent the day at the lake together.

It was a couple of days later that Bill, who is kind of a chatterbox, told me that while they were drinking beer and cleaning the fish Albert confessed to an affair with my best friend, Helen. I've been just sick over this ever since Bill told me. But I am holding everything in, since I don't know who to confide in.

Now my husband won't have anything to do with Bill and I feel bad about that, too. I feel like I'm going to bust if I don't talk to somebody! I'm wondering what your take is on all this?

Signed,
Sick Of Holding Everything In

Dear Sick,

I don't blame your husband for not talking to Bill. First, no one wants a blabbermouth in the boat. Angling is difficult enough without someone scaring the fish with their constant blather.

Second, Bill obviously cannot hold his beer or his tongue. That's a bad combination for someone seeking male friendship. I'd recommend Matchy and Bigbrimar find another fishing partner.

By the way, did they have any luck? I'm always looking for new waters to troll. I can replace Bill as your close friend too, and comfort you in your time of stress. Just wear something sexy when I come over. You will feel better about yourself.

You can see that I am sensitive and caring.

Faldo

Saturday, November 14, 2009

NPP @ PPL was a Great Night!

I’ve heard it said that “You can’t put a price on a good time!” And that is what we had.

Although I did have a young lady in Las Vegas tell me at the dice table after I said that – “Well I can.” I wonder what she meant by that?

It was nice to see flesh and bones behind the screen names. And I didn’t think it was possible, but NPP players are even nicer people 'in person', than they are - on line.

A hat tip also to the Premier Poker Lounge, as they were ready for the NPP invasion, and they ran a smooth tournament, with healthy cash games afterwards.

Now on to the action. If I miss something or someone, please forgive me and comment with corrections. Faldo is tired, hung over and a little rushed getting these results posted:

(1) Derf-63 was the first NPP casualty. His (AQ) got cracked by (A8). I thought this kind of stuff only happened on PokerStars?

(2) Wingsfancurt was out next as his(AT) could not catch an (AJ).

(3) Mikeniks-Faldo got a little too aggressive with (KQ). On a flop of [AA8], I moved all-in and – of course – my uncanny hand reading ability somehow failed to see that the villain was holding (AT).

(4) T3chlady had the same bad luck experience at PPL as she does on PokerStars, as her (AA) lost to (A2) with a flop of [22Q]. You got to be kidding me?

(5) Mistermusic5 was out around here somewhere. Not only did I not get the hand, but I didn’t get to meet ‘Scott’ either. Next time, for sure.

(6) McGuiness007 was literally blinded out as he ran card dead all night.

(7) LittleRedElf’s cards were not much better and finally his (Ah 8h) lost to (AQ).

(8) ThePunk75 got a crusher exit as he flops two pair with his (K9) only to watch his opponent hit a straight on the river.

(9) Tomservo2 also could not buy a break as his (AQ) lost to an (A6) and a flopped [6].

(10) Theedouble*d got deeper (twss) in the tournament, but just went card dead a little later than McGuiness007 did. Basically had to shove, and got no nub.

(11) A short-stacked (SS) Boother36 had to try with (6s 4s) and ran into (JJ).

(12) A (SS) Beerhog sees his (Ks Qs) lose to (AT). But he did get the first NPP cash of the night by bubbling and getting his entry fee back.

(13) And the hero of the night was K9isadog who brought NPP home a bronze medal with a 3rd place finish! I didn’t get the details as by this time the long day and the adult beverages had taken their revenge on your reporter.

Thanks again to everyone who attended and who made this a fun evening. We will do it again and I think we can grow the attendance.