Thursday, July 28, 2016

ThePunk75 Wins for the 6th Time in 2016

Fabiana waits for ThePunk75 on the Winner's Circle
Well, its finally official. ThePunk75 has been playing on another level than the rest of us this year.
All of the hard work and dedication to poker is paying off here at NPP.

ThePunk is a regular at cash games, charity poker games and the casino scene for poker. The knowledge and practice of hours at real felt has make him the 'main man' at NPP!

ThePunk75 just passed "The Legend" - LittleRedElf for the lead in total NPP tournament wins.

This is a feat that Faldo never saw anyone doing!

To be fair to the Elf, he is playing poker at NPP right now, while - at the same time - bowling in his league!

But, to also be fair, ThePunk misses a lot of tournaments at NPP due to coaching duties with his sons.

In any event, these two are at the top - and right now - there is a new sheriff in town and his name is ThePunk75!

2nd - 95corolla
3rd - T3chlady
4th - Theedouble*d
Bubble - GMOgolf

Congratulations to ThePunk75 on his 30th NPP win!

Now, some strange facts about the USA:

In more than half the states in the country, a college football coach is the highest paid public employee.

Half of all Americans don't save a penny of their paychecks. Half don't have any emergency provisions either.

Apple has more money than the US Treasury.

Alaska has a longer coastline than the rest of the United States put together.

When the Democrat War on Poverty with LBJ started in the 1960's:
- 10% of all children grew up in single parent homes. Now it is 35%
- less than 5% of children were born out of wedlock. Now it is 40%
- the poverty rate for US households was 6.8%. Now it is 37%
Say thank you to a Democrat voter.

Almost 70% of the bachelor degrees in the USA go to women. So when these Liberal Arts, Cultural Diversity Studies, Women's Studies and Environmental Studies women with degrees ask you if you want fries with that - or use their welfare stamps - show them respect. Even though they are defaulting on their student loans that total about a half a million dollars.

Still, 75% of women said 'a steady job' is the #1 thing they look for in a man when dating. So much for feminists.

20 percent of the garbage in US landfills is food. Don't believe the lies about hunger in this country.

Montana has three times as many cows as it does people.

The Grizzly Bear is the official symbol of California. Much like a sane individual, a grizzly bear has not inhabited California since 1922.

The state with the most millionaires is Maryland.

If you are not in debt and have $10 in your pocket, you are richer than 40% of the people in this country. When you consider that half of the country is getting some kind of a government handout - what would you expect?

By the time a child reaches the age of 18, they will have seen 45,000 murders on television or movies. Much much higher if they play video games.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Faldo Wins for the 2nd Time in 2016

Hey.....who took this unauthorized picture of Faldo using his camera?
Is there a full moon out tonight or something? Uh........yes there was!

Something was going on as Faldo got some hot... HOT cards tonight, allowing him to build a big chip lead in the middle of the tournament and hold on for the victory over a field of 13 players.

2nd - LittleRedElf
3rd - Tomservo2
4th - GMOgolf
Bubble -  KingBing420

The bubble means that you finish JUST out of the points earned in the NPP race.

That is usually where Faldo ends up too.

And now a classic "Little Johnnie" story:

Little Johnnie is at the playground with his mom when he sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into a nearby woods.

Curious, Johnnie heads into the woods to follow the car. He sees Daddy and his Aunt Jane in a passionate hug. He watches for a while as Daddy and Aunt Jane get out of the car and lay in the secluded grassy area.

Little Johnnie can't wait to share what he saw with his Mother and he sprints back to the playground.

"Mommy, Mommy - I was in the woods and I saw Daddy's car and it was Daddy and ........"

His Mother cuts him off and tells him to slow down and tell her the whole story slowly.

So Johnnie explains how he saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in the woods kissing. Then he saw Daddy helping Aunt Jane off with her shirt. And then Aunt Jane helped Daddy off with his pants. And then Aunt Jane and Daddy laid down on the grass and ......

His mother cut him off again and said, "Johnnie, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save it and you can tell me the rest of of it - but from the beginning - at dinnertime. I want your Dad to hear it too, ok?"

At the dinner table, with his Mother's permission, Johnnie starts and tells the same story about his Dad driving into the woods with Aunt Jane, the kissing, the undressing, the laying down on the grass.....and then he continued...

"Then Daddy and Aunt Jane started doing what you and Uncle Bill did when Daddy was away on that long hunting trip last year."

Friday, July 15, 2016

If You Vote Democrat - You Are To Blame for Everything. Period.

The truth hurts.

Liberalism is responsible for every problem in this country - Period.

Every cesspool in this nation is Democrat controlled - be it a city or our school system.

Nearly every Democrat politician is a crook, traitor or a racist - or all three.

Every terrorist attack is the fault of a Democrat voter - who elected weak, politically correct, or cowardly politicians - or a Muslim sympathizer - like Barrack Insane Obama.

Every police killing and cop killing is the fault of the Democrat Party. They have destroyed the Americans Who Happen to be Black family and their belief in the American Dream, simply for political power. The Democrat Part is the new plantation - who have the AWHB poor and helpless without government handouts. It was done on purpose.

The Democrat Party has destroyed our education system, who now teach our children communist mantra instead of the 3R's - and our children are now dumber than dirt compared to children in the rest of the world.

Our children have been taught at your neighborhood school to hate their country, their race in the case of White kids, to feel helpless in the case of Black kids, and to embrace your culture from other countries in the case of immigrant children - legal or illegal.

Democrats have flooded our nation with illegal aliens. Why? There is only one reason for this, based on the truth listed above. It is to undermine our American capitalist system, our Constitution and to bury this nation in people needing government assistance - and therefore Democrat voters - legal or not. For that matter - alive or not.

The Democrats have a liar, crook, communist, racist, narcissist, traitor and Muslim sympathizer in the White House now.

Their replacement is a liar, crook, communist, narcissist, traitor and weak re-tread, who has more scandals behind her than any politician in history.

The Republican Party has seen the writing on the wall and are acting like the chicken that wants to be the last one eaten by the wolf - instead of challenging the wolf.

We have one candidate that is talking like he will fight the wolf. Faldo does not see it happening. Even if elected - Trump will find the same situation Jesse Ventura discovered when he won a governorship as an independent. BOTH parties were against him and he could not get any meaning repairs done.

History repeats itself.

This article was not a call to vote for Trump - although Faldo will.

It is to state plainly that the blame for the fall of the United States of America and all the terror, killings, starvation and blight that will follow is the fault of every Democrat voter. Period.

Democrats are not to be tolerated any more than an armed, bomb-loaded terrorist. The only difference between the two is that one will kill you faster. In that respect, a terrorist is actually more merciful than a Democrat voter.


Thursday, July 14, 2016

Tomservo2 Wins for the First Time in 2016

Tomservo2 has a nice cheering section.
Tomservo2 beat a field of 16 players to win for the first time this year. And the wily NPP veteran puts himself in the 3rd quarter race with this win. He also moves up on the NPP Walk of Fame - passing retired legend 7Jokers.

2nd - Derf-63
3rd - Mikeniks-Faldo
4th - ThePunk75
5th - Smaloo315
Bubble - GMOgolf

Congratulations to Tomservo2 on his 19th NPP win!

Now for some knowledge:

42.7% of all statistics are made up.

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

Remember, half the people you know - are below average.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

I drink way too much to worry about cholesterol.

If everything seems to be going good, you obviously overlooked something.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

.........And now a fall joke a little early.

A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets in the cab and the driver won't stop staring at her.

She asks him why he is staring and he says, "I have a question but I don't want to offend you sister."

She says, "You won't offend me. When you are as old as I am, you hear just about everything. Please ask your question."

The man blurts out, "Well I have always had a fantasy of kissing a nun passionately."

The nun thinks for a minute and says, "Well maybe I will allow it if you are #1, a catholic and #2 you must be single."

The man gets very excited and says, "Yes I am both of those!"

The nun says, "Very well. Pull into the next alley where we won't be seen."

The cabbie does just that, jumps into the back seat and he and the nun have a long, passionate kiss that would make a hooker blush!

But when it's over and they are back driving, suddenly the cabbie starts softly crying. By the time they get to the nun's stop, he is crying uncontrollably.

The nun gets out but leans back in, throws the fee and a small tip in the passenger seat and asks why he is crying so hard.

The cabbie says in a shattered voice, "I LIED. I am Jewish and ...I am married!"

The nun says, "That's ok. I'm not really a nun. My name is Kevin and I am on my way to a Halloween Party."

Thursday, July 07, 2016

ThePunk75 Wins for the 5th Time in 2016

ThePunk75 wins ......5 times over.
ThePunk75 is playing at another level than the rest of us - with the possible exception of The Elf himself.

ThePunk75 busted Faldo with the 1st hand of the night and - even with those unlucky chips in his stack - goes on to beat a 14 player field.

Again, ThePunk75 is wearing out the NPP field -even though he has already earned a seat in the 2016 NPP Final.  Winners just keep winning!

2nd - 95corolla
3rd - LittleRedElf
4th - Derf-63
Bubble - KingBing420

Congratulations to ThePunk75 on his 29th NPP win!

Now for some more Zen for you:

Some days you are the bug and other days you are the windshield.

Don't worry. It only seems kinky the first time.

Good judgement comes from a bad experience. And a lot of bad experiences comes from bad judgement.

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

There are two theories to arguing with women, and neither of them work.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

We are born naked, wet, hungry and then get our ass slapped......then things get worse.

The way to make a small fortune betting the horses is to start with a large fortune.

If at first you don't succeed, keep on sucking until you do succeed.


A sweet little girl - who happens to have a lisp - walks into a pet store and asks the shopkeeper,

"Excuthe me misthter? Do you have wittle wabbits?"

The shopkeeper squats down so he is eye level with the pretty little girl and says,

"Yes we do sweetheart. Do you want the little white wabbit over there? Or the fuzzy black wabbit over there? Or maybe the wittle brown wabbit over there?"

The little leans forward toward the shopkeeper and in a quiet voice says, "I don't think my pyfon weally gives a phuck."

Tuesday, July 05, 2016

The United States of America - Presumed Dead in 2011 - Declared Dead in 2016

Its official - The United States of America and the Constitution that beat in it's chest, was officially declared dead July 5th, 2016.

Although thought to be dead in November 2011 after the re-election of the anti-American communist Barack Hussein Obama, there were many who believed the USA was not dead, but merely in a coma it could not quite wake up from.

No such illusion exists now as now - as we accepted the fact that the USA's brain died in 2008, the heart has officially expired exactly one day after it's 240th birthday.

Let's go thru the health history of the United States:

Born with a strong will for individual independence and freedom, the USA had a strong and healthy heart called the Constitution.

Although the creators of this heart said at it's birth that it would only last 200 years, many scoffed at the idea that the best heart of a nation EVER created by man - written with the hand of GOD - could ever quit beating.

But as time goes on chronic ills, injuries, germs, bacteria, viruses and cancers - also known as Democrats and liberals - constantly attack a healthy body until it dies of communism and fascism.

The onset of the United States first sickness was the Cholera Epidemic in 1920 - also known as the passing of the 19th Amendment. This gave women the right to vote and granting the Democrats a majority voting block for the rest of the country's life.

Even though some women rise above it, instinctively women want security over freedom. Democrats know this and use it every chance they get. Democrats know if you promise - just promise - to give women and their children things - they will vote for you.

Our nation has had diarrhea of the mouth (gimmie, gimmie, gimme) ever since.

This diarrhea weakened the USA for the next disease called the New Deal in 1932 by the Democrat FDR. This included government socializing many businesses and handing out a retirement benefit known as Social Security. Now even though it was a Democratic scheme to collect more taxes since it was thought at the time not very many would live long to collect, this Polio crippled our nation's desire for work. After all, you had a pot of government gold waiting for you when you 'retired'.

The USA stayed strong for a while because world wars kept Democrats from being able to destroy from within. So they patiently waited - even murdering one of their own (Kennedy) - so they could bring in the Small Pox of LBJ's New Society of 1964. The women diarrhea carriers welcomed the welfare with open arms! (Gimmie, gimmie, gimmie).

The Democrats then caused the loss of the Vietnam War in 1975, giving the USA malaria.

The election of Jimmie Carter in 1976 gave the USA Ebola on top of that! But the USA fought back with the antibiotics, vaccines and sulfa of Ronald Reagan in 1980 to regain it's strength - temporarily.

The USA suffered a heart attack in September 2001and never fully recovered.

Oh, it got on the mend somewhat, even out of the ER for a while. But the tiger that was the USA was now shown to the world to be made of paper - and much thinner paper than an emergency room hospital gown cotton.

AIDS attacked the USA in 2008 with the election of a president with a terrorist's name. This 'diversity' was supposed to heal all wounds and cure all diseases, but all it did was make the USA weaker and susceptible to every disease a Democrat could infect a county with.

The old aspirin and penicillin called Republicans never even left the medicine cabinet. Matter of fact, they became an influenza to assist in drowning of the USA in a painful pneumonia.

The worse forms of every cancer - at a Stage 4 level - attacked the USA in 2012 as Barrack Hussein Obama stole a second term after torturing the USA and its Constitution non stop for four years. Democrats other places had also done that for four years, but a majority were cured by some Republican radiation.

But the relief was short-lived as this radiation seemed to develop an extremely short half-life and disappeared from the body without a trace - very shortly after being injected.

This allowed this cancer concoction known as Democrat Party to take over the USA mind and body completely. The soul, body, mind and heart of the United States of America is now dead. Completely dead.

Death was confirmed today as Hillary Clinton was found to be guilty of treason, but will be allowed to be the next president of a rotting corpse. Democrats love rot. Their power comes from the decay they create.

Faldo will drink heavily at the wake of his country. Now Faldo knows how the regular German citizens felt during the rise of Adolf Hitler. They knew it was the beginning of the end, but were powerless to stop it.

Sunday, July 03, 2016

ThePunk75 Wins for the 4th Time in 2016

Miesha Tate - another winner - waits for ThePunk75 in the NPP Lounge.
ThePunk75 didn't need to win it.....but he did. Winners just do what they do.

It is nice that our already clinched seat holders to stay involved, stay focused and keep the tournament 'real'. This type of commitment to the Palace means you always have to earn your seat in an NPP Final.

That is just the type of people we have at NPP.

ThePunk75 defeats a field of 15 players.

2nd - Theedouble*d
3rd - Tomservo2
4th - GMOgolf
5th - Smaloo
Bubble - T3chlady

On our country's 240th birthday, I won't go where I want to go - and talk about how Thomas Jefferson said that our Republic and Constitution would last only 200 years. And that the joke is on him - we lasted 224 years. The idiot was way off.

No - I will keep it light. If fact, I will give you a dose of soothing Zen:

Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk in front of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me - just leave me the hell alone.

It's always darkest before for the dawn. So if you are going to steal vegetables from your neighbor's garden, that is the time to do it.

Sex is like air. It's not important unless you are not getting any.

Always remember - you are unique. Just like everyone else.

If you think no one cares if you live or die - try not paying your bills for a few months.

Before you criticize anyone, you must walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away and you have their shoes as a bonus.

If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for the day. Teach a man how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

If you lend someone $20 and never see them again - it was worth it.