Thursday, April 30, 2009

Faldo Analyzes Why Bad Luck Follows Him (rationally for a change)

Ever notice how it seems that you lose with the better hand a lot more often than you win with the lesser hand?

You know why that is? Because it is true, that’s why.

If you are a better than average player, you will be all-in with the best hand many times more than you are with the lesser hand. My guess is around four times more often.

We all have to move with less than premium hands when short-stacked or we take a shot to eliminate players when we have a big stack. So that factors in too.

But my gut (no data gathered) tells me it is about a 4 to 1 ratio. Now, let’s assume my gut is correct (and hey, when is Faldo ever wrong?). If you think about it, how many times are you really bigger than a 4 to 1 favorite pre-flop or even after the flop? I think a 2 to 1 favorite is about the best you are on average.

To make the math easy for those of you who attended government schools (like me), take a look at this:

Best hand 400 times: wins 268 times – loses 132 times.
Worst hand 100 times: win 33 times – lose 67 times

There you have it. You lose four times more often with the best hand (132) than you win with the worst hand (33).

Now you can argue my gut is wrong or my favorite percentages are low, but as a bit of a stats expert, I have to tell you, you would have to move my numbers quite a bit to change the outcome of what I am saying.

If it is any consolation (which it is not when you bubble as the favorite, which I have more times than Beerhog has had a beer), of the 500 hands shown, you did win 301 times.

Wait, that is not good news is it? That means the better hand only wins 3 hands to the lesser hand’s 2.

But that is why it is called gambling – and some luck is involved. We will discuss ‘luck’ next week.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

LittleRedElf Returns to His Winning Ways

LittleRedElf is always winning on PokerStars. But winning at NPP is always a tough proposition even for the best player.

Usually, he beats all of us at NPP - while winning one or two tourneys on PokerStars at the same time! Tonight, before his trip to Las Vegas, he decided to just concentrate on us. As you see, this is not healthy for the rest of tonight’s field of twenty-four players.

Your host missed the tourney start as a minor family emergency happened just prior to tournament time. My in-laws lost their keys and could not get in their condo. Faldo was to the rescue, driving over the spare set.

But we welcomed three new players to the NPP stable; Funtoon, Michpower09 and TresStooges. And returning to the NPP fold from 2008, Tomservo2. Welcome all of you!

On to the action:

10 min: Again, my apologies for getting a late start, but getting my mother-in-law into her own house seemed a better plan than her staying here and my wife making me sleep outside to see how I like it!

So I missed the demise of Kensik (24th).

21 min: Gotbug (23rd). I just missed this hand getting situated for reporting and explaining my absence from the field tonight.

30 min: Nixi44 (22nd) thinks her (99) is best pre-flop and goes all-in. She is correct as Duder1123 has (Q9). But the 2 to 1 Queen-dog shows on the flop and Nixi can return to her duties as masseuse for SirGash.

32 min: CrackBuyer’s (21st) (88) loses to Funtoon’s (99).

33 min: A short-stacked Quagmire2752 (20th) moves all-in with (77) and is called in two places by Michpower09 (TT) and Akensi (JJ). Ouch!

37 min: Wingsfancurt (19th) hits his trips on the flop but Tomservo2 hits his straight on the turn.

42 min: Three people see a flop of [5c 8c Jh]. Amyada19 bets the pot, Michpower09 calls and TresStooges (18th) raises the same original pot amount, and both call. The turn is the [Ad]. Everyone checks to TheStooge, who bets 1/3 of the pot and is called by Amy. The river is a blank [2d], they get their stacks all-in, and it is TresStooges with kicker problems.

50 min: Tigercub8189 (17th) overplays his (JJ) when an [A] falls on the flop for Biglou93 holding (A9). This cripples the Cub who exits a few hands later.

52 min: A short-stacked Duder1123 (16th) tries it with (Kh 4h) but cannot catch Rjmech with (K9).

1st Break:
LittleRedElf 6250
Rjmech 4285
Rennzzo 3660
Biglou93 3240
Michpower09 3065
Amyada19 2820
ThePunk75 2195
SirGash 1960
Bigbrimar 1680
Tomservo2 1650
Funtoon 1460
Absea98 1160
Tripp AA 1020
Akensi 1005
Fusciardi 550

62 min: Short-stacked Fusciardi (15th) makes his move with (Qs 4s) and is called by short-stacked TrippAA with (98). Tripp pairs his bottom card on the flop.

70 min: A short-stacked ThePunk75 (14th) goes with (AT) (62%) and Absea98 takes him out with (98) (37%), pairing his bottom card. A hot night for (98).

76 min: Two big stacks collide here as Michpower09 (13th) limps in and calls LittleRedElf’s five times the blind raise! A [2s Kh 6c] flop and LRE moves all-in with (AK) and is called by Michpower09 (KQ).

This starts a fury of action and departures.

78 min: LittleRedElf calls Funtoon’s (12th) big blind. Fun calls LittleRedElf’s five times the blind raise after a flop of [3h Kh 9s]. It is now Fun who moves all in with (K6] and LRE calls with [KT].

LRE eliminates two players and builds a monster chip lead – with better kickers????

79 min: Short-stacked Amyada19 (11th) moves all-in with (Ac 5c) and Biglou93 calls with (99). No Ace or 3-club rescue happens.

82 min: Four players limp in. LittleRedElf bets three times the blind and only Akensi (10th) moves all-in with (99) (51%) and is called by LRE with (JT) (49%). LRE wins the coin flip with a [T] on the flop.

88 min: Short-stacked Rennzzo (9th) moves all-in with (9h 5c) and is called by LittleRedElf with (AT).

90 min: The 12-minute carnage is ended when a short-stacked TrippAA (8th) goes all-in with (Ah 8h) and runs into Absea98 holding (22).

109 min: Biglou93 (7th) makes his stand with (QT) and is called by SirGash with (As 8s) and the Spade-flush flops! Now the carnage begins anew.

113 min: Bigbrimar (6th), who rose from the dead a couple times tonight, tries an all-in bluff with (33) and has a coin flip against Rjmech with (AJ), but RJ makes a straight on the turn.

114 min: Tomservo2 (5th) loses his race with (AQ) against LittleRedElf’s (44).

115 min: Rjmech (4th) goes all-in with a semi-bluff with (Qd 5d) but is called by LittleRedElf with (AQ).

117 min: The clash I bought my ring-side seat for. SirGash (3rd) calls LittleRedElf’s big blind.

The flop is [7s Ah 2s] and they both check it. The turn is a [5c]. SirGash bets, LRE raises, Gash pushes (7c 2c – two pair) and is called (4h 3c – baby straight). No boat on the river and LRE’s chip pile is huge.

Sirgash is cold-decked here, I think. Could SirGash bet LRE out of that pot after the flop? Sure, he could have as a 4 to 1 favorite as it turned out and a big bet gets LRE to surrender. But why do that?

Gash is behind 3 to 1 in chips and is trying to double up to get back in the hunt for a victory. It just didn’t work out, but he gets an A for effort.

Heads up: LittleRedElf 27000 - Absea98 9000

2nd break:
LittleRedElf 19822
Absea98 16178

In eight minutes, Absea98 has made a match of it! In thirteen minutes, he takes the lead:

125 min: Absea98 19000 - LittleRedElf 17000

129 min: LittleRedElf moves in with (TT) and Absea98 (2nd) doesn’t believe LRE and calls with (QJ). No lady or hook arrive and Absea is crippled.

130 min: LittleRedElf gets the dream (AA) when Absea98 gets (66) and it’s over.

Congratulations to LittleRedElf on his 2nd NPP win!

1st – LittleRedElf
2nd – Absea98
3rd – SirGash
4th – Rjmech
5th – Tomservo2
6th – Bigbrimar
7th – Biglou93
8th – TrippAA
9th – Rennzzo

Standings for 2nd quarter and total points are on the right side of the blog!

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Douge2's Humor Corner II

Twenty interesting things learned when you have sons, like ...

1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.

8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12. Super glue is forever.

13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you u still l can't walk on water.

14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15. VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

16. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

17. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

18. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

19. The average fire department response time is 8 minutes.

20. 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

Top Ten Old West Phrases That Will Never Sound The Same Since Broke Back Mountain

1. "I'm gonna pump you fulla lead!"

2. "Give me a stiff one, barkeep!"

3. "Don't fret---I've been in tight spots before."

4. "Howdy, pardner."

5. You stay here while I sneak around from behind."

6. Two words: "Saddle Sore."

7. "Hold it right there! Now, move your hand, reeeal slow-like, so I can count the hairs"

8. "Let's mount up!"

9. "Nice spread [wide stance] ya got there!"

10. "Ride'em cowboy!"

Thursday, April 23, 2009

An Update of the Faldo Internet Poker Site Reviews

Let's start with the BIG BOYS - Site name and (software):

Poker Stars (PokerStars)
Full Tilt Poker (Full Tilt Poker)
Ultimate Bet / Absolute Poker (Cereus Network)
Bo Dog Poker (Bodog Poker)
Cake Poker / Doyle's Poker Room / Sportsbook Poker (Cake Poker Network)

One thing that becomes apparent is that all sites still open to US players, run their own software. Although Ultimate Bet and Absolute Poker are the only sites open to US players that run a skin of a basic software that shares players.

Doyle's Room left the Prima Poker network to join Cake Poker as it was not allowing US players. Cake Poker is fundable thru eWallet.

If you remember a site called "The Poker Room", which is now closed to US players, it is the skin of at least 30 sites, all with different names, but the same player base.

You may have seen adds for Carbon Poker (Poker dot com originally). It is the main site but a skin of about ten other sites.

CD Poker and Titan Poker (closed to US players) were two sites that were skins of each other, but have 'franchised out' into about ten skin sites too.

Poker Host (closed to Michigan players) also sells it's skin to about ten other sites.

Party Poker (closed to US players) is also the skin of dozens of sites.

Stay with the BIG BOYS listed above and you should be fine. Not from the horrendous bad beats and player collusion, but from the site closing and taking your money.

Speaking of which, has happened to Faldo a few times. Jet Poker and Tropical Poker (both running their own software, by the way) just up and closed - taking player deposits with them.

Pokertropolis and Bugsy’s Club closed, but returned all player funds first! Very classy, as were the sites - which I miss. Their software was good (as was Tropical Poker's). I wonder if you can find the software somewhere to buy on the cheap? We could play NPP Tuesdays on the NPP site!

I would like to close this article with a list of poker site names that I think are lame. Some are easy to tell how they were marketing their site to get players to them. Some defy logic. Some are still open and some are closed. Take a gander:

32Red Poker
Adult Poker Party
Bamba Poker
Bikini Poker
Blue Lizard Poker
Bombshell Poker
Celeb Poker
Cheribino Poker
Cindy's (Margolis) Poker
Green Tie Poker
Jazz Poker
Naked Poker
Pamela (Anderson) Poker
Piggs Peak Poker
Playboy Poker
Victoria (Principle) Poker
Virgin Poker
Vulcan Poker
Wingwow Poker

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Now, TheNewY2K Returns to NPP, and Wins

An epidemic of past winners returning to dominate, but this win is no surprise. I have to see how big of a lead it is, but TheNewY2K has the highest average point total per round of any player with over five starts. The play was hot tonight and Y2K simply avoided the minefields in the 24-player field, while dropping bombs himself!

We welcomed two new players to the NPP stable tonight – Kaytdid and Wingsfancurt.

People played tonight like they had a plane to catch. Only a couple patches where no one was getting bounced out of the tourney. On to the action:

5 min: Akensi gets crippled as her (AK) runs into RKidder51400’s (AA).
12 min: ThePunk75 (24th) sees his (JJ) run into Douge2’s (AA).

15 min: Absea98 and Derf-63 call CrackBuyer’s (23rd) raise. The flop is [7s Jc 5d]. Absea bets, Crack raises and Derf goes all-in! Guys, it’s a rag flop! What is up with this? CrackBuyer calls with (QQ) and Derf shows his (AJ). Ok, got it. An [A] falls on the turn and no nub for the Buyer.

16 min: BigLou93’s trip deuces put Akensi (22nd) out of her misery.
21 min: I was playing a hand and missed the loss of Gotbug (21st).

32 min: A short-stacked Wingsfancurt (20th) sees his (JJ) get run down by Rjmech’s (99) with a [9] on the flop. We treat most new players this way Curt. Think of it as an initiation.

36 min: A short-stacked Kensik (19th) has to go with (Q8) and can’t catch LittleRedElf’s (A8).

38 min: Six players see a family pot flop of [9h 7d Tc]. The family splits to a partnership as Douge2 (18th) bets and only TheNewY2K calls. A [Jd] turns, Douge bets, Y2K moves all-in with (KQ) and Douge calls (A8). Another painful exit.

40 min: Another six player flop; [Jh 3d Th]. LittleRedElf bets small and Theedouble*d (17th) moves all-in. Mikeniks-Faldo (A3) and LRE (AT) both call that.

They check a blank turn of [2s]. When an [A] falls on the river, Faldo throws a bet out there and gets called by LRE’s bigger two pair. The DD didn’t have the goods and mucks.

48 min: This time a four player flop of [Tc Td Js]. Nahanni74 (9d 8d) moves all-in with a straight draw semi-bluff. Absea98 (16th) has to call with two pair (AJ). A [Q] for Nahanni’s straight hit on the turn.

49 min: Rjmech sees his (AK) run into Derf-63’s (AA) to cripple him.
50 min: I am playing the next hand and miss Fusciardi’s (15th) demise.
51 min: Rjmech’s (14th) short-stacked all-in with (J7) is called by Mikeniks-Faldo holding (KJ) and does not catch up.

58 min: A short-stacked UMichPoker (13th) tries it with (A7) but finds Smookie27 waiting with (JJ).

1st Break:
Smookie27 7760
TheNewY2K 6475
Tripp AA 3762
Nahanni74 3610
Kaytdid 2970
Derf-63 2650
LittleRedElf 2570
Biglou93 2040
RKidder51400 1385
Tigercub8189 1130
Mikeniks-Faldo 1048
Boother36 600

67 min: Boother36 (12th) never did show and blinds out.

69 min: A short-stacked Tigercub8189 (11th) goes with (A8) and Nahanni74 takes him out with (AK).

72 min: Mikeniks-Faldo (10th) goes all-in with (33h) and never has a chance at a coin flip against TheNewY2K’s (AJh) as an [Ah Jc 6h] flop. Runner – runner hearts rubs salt in the wound for Bubble Faldo.

73 min: Painful exits were plentiful this evening. Derf-63’s (9th) lead with (Kd Td) against TheNewY2K’s (Qh 9h) is short lived as a [Q] falls on the flop.

77 min: Biglou93 (8th) loses his coin flip with (99) against RKidder51400’s (AQ) when an [A] lands on the river!

93 min: Finally, a calming period until LittleRedElf (7th) moves all-in with (55) over TheNewY2K’s raise. Y2K calls the small increase with (A7). The board shows [JJTT] counterfeiting LRE’s hand.

100 min: RKidder51400 (6th) re-raises TrippAA with an all-in move and (AT). Tripp calls with (AJ).

101 min: Nahanni74 (5th) goes all-in with (44) and finds TheNewY2K holding (QQ).
102 min: Smookie27 (4th) sees his (K9) run into Kaytdid’s (AK).

112 min: TrippAA (3rd) tries an all-in bluff with (Qc Jc) and runs into TheNewY2K’s (AK).

2nd break:
TheNewY2K 31690
Kaytdid 4310

122 min: Kaytdid (2nd) has to try with (KJ), but TheNewY2K’s (88) holds up to end the night.

Congratulations to TheNewY2K on a fine win and also to Kaytdid on an outstanding rookie showing! NPP just is loaded with fine poker players!

1st – TheNewY2K
2nd - Kaytdid
3rd – Tripp AA
4th – Smookie27
5th – Nahanni74
6th – RKidder51400
7th – LittleRedElf
8th – Biglou93
9th – Derf-63

Standings for 2nd quarter and total points are on the right side of the blog!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

ArticBlast1 Hosts an NPP Home Game

Old fashioned limit poker was on tap – as was the pizza, chips and beer!

Beerhog and Faldo had cigars in Matchy’s driveway – as a pre-game warm up.

Boother, Farrell, Bo and a couple others snuggled up to ArticBlast’s octagon felt.

Life is tough as after a lunch of wings and beer, I had to play golf BEFORE cigars and a night of poker with buddies. Someone has to do it.

The laughs were many as the cards flew. Faldo ended up the big winner.

Thanks for organizing the game ArticBlast1 and Matchy. And, yes – they shamed Faldo into re-opening NPP for a game soon.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Just for Fun

Beerhog goes into an adult store and asks for an inflatable love doll.

Salesperson asks, "Male or female"?
Beerhog answers, "Female".

Salesperson asks, "Black or white"?
Beerhog answers, "White".

Salesperson asks, "Christian or Muslim"?
Beerhog asks, "What the hell does religion have to do with it"?

Salesperson says, "The Muslim one blows itself up"!

Dave the Dog and his lovely wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road.

When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350.00.

Dave explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00.

When the clerk tells him $350.00 is the standard rate, Dave insists on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appears, listens to Dave, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use.

"But we didn't use them," Dave complains.

"Well, they are here, and you could have," explains the Manager. He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here," the Manager says.

"But we didn't go to any of those shows, "complains Dave again.

"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replies.

No matter what amenity the Manager mentions, Dave’s reply was always, "But we didn't use it!"

The Manager is unmoved, and eventually Dave gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the Manager.

The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check. "But sir," he says, this check is only made out for $50.00."

That's correct," says Dave "I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with my wife."

"But I didn't!" exclaims the Manager.

“Well, too bad," the man replies. "She was here and – for $300 - you could have.”

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Boother36 Returns to NPP Winning Form

All you have to do is look at the NPP records at the side of the blog to know what Boother36 is all about.

He is just one of the reasons NPP is the place to play! I am not kidding or making a joke when I say the very best poker players don’t want you to know who they are - and the best poker players you never heard of - play at NPP.

You want to hone your skills against the best – you are here and at home.

We welcomed five new players to the NPP family tonight – Amyada19, Derf-63, Gotbug, Rosco24 and Rtk2010. Also returning from some time off, Sjagot1990. Welcome everyone!

Now on to the action!

4 min: I was busy over-betting my (AA) so I missed Boother36’s straight eliminating Rennzzo (26th). Boother36 with chips early did not help my mood either.

20 min: Gotbug (25th) got the typical NPP greeting from the PokerStars deck as his J-high flush lost to Aqualung85’s A-high flush.

23 min: Quagmire2752 (24th) runs into Absea98’s trip Jacks.

This gap in casualties is proof of the level of play at NPP. But rising blinds take their toll.

47 min: Tigercub8189 (23rd) has his (AT) lose the lopsided race to BigLou93’s (JJ).

48 min: A short-stacked CrackBuyer (22nd) sees his (KK) lose to another short-stack, Faldo with (As Qs) with an [A] on the turn. Sorry Buyer. You might have done more with the opportunity than I did.

49 min: While I was sucking out on CrackBuyer, Absea98 did a double kill of TrippAA (21st) and Sirgash (20th).

52 min: A short-stacked Rosco24 (19th) cannot get his (A2) to run down short-stacked UMichPoker (55).

55 min: UMichPoker (18th) does not escape the Break Reaper as her (AQ) runs into Boother36’s (QQ).

58 min: Douge2 spits in the Break Reaper’s face – and Biglou93 at the same time – as his short-stacked (JJ) overtakes Lou’s (AA). Ouch!

1st Break:
Boother36 5970
Absea98 4805
Thedouble*d 3930
Kensik 2665
Douge2 2640
Rjmech 2245
Rtk2010 2130
Sjagot1990 2125
Amyada19 2010
LittleRedElf 1994
Fuscairdi 1926
Mikeniks-Faldo 1435
Biglou93 1235
Derf-63 1230
Aqualung85 1055
Akensi 1010
Bigbrimar 595

64 min: Theedouble*d decides to have his (Kh Qh) lay the second double elimination of the night on the field as his flush takes out Aqualung85 (17th) and Derf-63 (16th).

66 min: Douge2 is crippled as his (JJ) runs into Sjagot1’s (AA). Douge2 does fight back into contention.

70 min: Biglou93’s (15th) lack of nub on PokerStars continues as his (44) runs right into Absea98’s (QQ).

72 min: Douge2 (14th) had built back some chips and PokerStars let him think a comeback was possible as he got action on his all-in with (KK). The big stack Theedouble*d has to call with (AQ) and spikes an [A] on the flop.

77 min: A bad beat on the hand before I was hoping would quiet the table down. Mikeniks-Faldo (13th) decides to steal blinds with (JT) but runs into the (QQ) of Sjagot1990.

Well, that was only the 2nd time I got beat by the best hand in the TEN times I lost tonight. 2 – 7 with the best hand and 1 – 3 with the worst hand - and you finish 13th.

Getting to a final table with Boother and Little Red Elf would have been a rush for me! It was not to be.

80 min: Fusciardi (12th) has to move with (A8) and loses a race to Kensik with (A9).

86 min: Bigbrimar (11th) waits until the very last minute for a hand, only to see his (JJ) lose to Rtk2010’s correct call with (Q7) and spike a [Q] on the flop.

91 min: A short-stacked LittleRedElf (10th) bubbles as his short-stacked (AQ) all-in loses the race to Rjmech’s (44).

93 min: A short-stacked Akensi (9th) has to go, but is called in two places by Kensik and Amyada19. Amyada19 wins it with a pair of Kings over Kensik’s (TT).

97 min: Now it is Kensik’s (8th) turn to make a stand with (KJ) but runs into Boother36’s (AK), which does out kick Ken to victory in the hand.

102 min: Absea98 (7th) is out next, but I wrote the wrong hand down trying to get the hand perfect. There was some action and I wanted to capture it. I did not. Can someone fill us in please?

103 min: Rtk2010 (6th) calls Boother36’s (KK) raise with an all-in holding (AK) and Boother’s pocket Cowboys hold on.

106 min: Amyada19 (5th) makes her move with (KT) but loses her race to Boother36’s (KQ).

109 min: Sjagot1990 (4th) has to go with (44) but Rjmech calls with (KJ) and hits a [K] on the river! The bubble always smarts. The point bubble hurts. The money bubble sucks.

110 min: Theedouble*d (3rd) re-raises Rjmech, who calls. The flop is [5d Ad 8s]. DD bets and RJ moves all-in with (Kd 8d) – middle pair and a flush draw. The pot committed DD has to call with his (Ah Th) for top pair, and the lead. RJ gets the flush on the turn AND river.

Heads up: Rjmech 23300 - Boother36 15700

113 min: Boother36 is all-in with (KJ) against Rjmech’s (AT). A [K] spikes on the flop, giving Boother the chip lead.

114 min: RJ has to try with (Qs 8s) but cannot overtake Boother’s (A6).

Congratulations to Boother - padding his NPP win total, and a very nice showing by our new members. NPP just keeps getting better and better!

1st – Boother36
2nd - Rjmech
3rd – Theedouble*d
4th – Sjagot1990
5th – Amyada19
6th – Rtk2010
7th – Absea98
8th – Kensik
9th – Akensi

Standings for 2nd quarter and total points are on the right side of the blog!

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Douge2's Humor Corner


A teacher asks her class, "If there are five birds sitting on a fence, and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on Little Faldo. He replies, "None They will all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is four, but I like your thinking."

Then, Little Faldo says, "I have a question for you. There are three women sitting on a bench having ice cream:

One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

To which Little Faldo replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on', but I like your thinking."

The old cowboy Tigercub8189 sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a city-slicker office woman sat down next to him.

She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."

She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat ... or drink coffee,” she giggled. “It seems that everything makes me think of women!"

The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a young college man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

Tigercub8189 replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out that I'm a lesbian."

Friday, April 10, 2009

Faldo Wins Premier Poker Lounge Re-buy Tourney

Well, it was a chop, but being able to outlast thirty other players, I’ll take it.

It is the scheduled tourney every Thursday evening at the Premier Poker Lounge at Mt. Brighton/ The Jackal Golf Course/ The Bauery Bar and Grill Restaurant.

Details for this great poker room are on the right side of the blog – either under Premier Poker Lounge or Michigan Poker News.

They run tourneys every Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday – with cash games available also.

The key hands for me tonight were (55) that outlasted a (Qs Js) while short-stacked and on the bubble (paying 3 with 4 left), and an (A9) all-in that got by a (Ks 9s), (Ad 8d) and a (65) with six left. To win a tourney, you have to play well – AND get lucky at the right time.

I got heads-up and was – of course – the much shorter stack (twss).

But I managed to get back to even when the offer was made to chop it – and we did. With the chop, I pulled in 5 times my entries, re-buys and add-ons.

As usual, the tourney was on time, well run and a good time.

Players constantly say that playing at the Premier Poker Lounge is like playing in a ‘home game’ and I could not agree more! Nice people and players just seem to hang out there.

It’s my poker room when home games are not happening. – Faldo

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

UMichPoker Wins Her 1st NPP Tourney

Michelle “UMichPoker” becomes the 3rd lady and 38th player to win an NPP tourney. She is also the CEO of the Michigan Poker News (see link on side of blog)! UMichPoker bested a field of 17 to take the title tonight.

Faldo was present but did not take a seat, due to the ‘bad beat gremlin’ that seems to have take refuge in my computers. I’m going to attempt to starve the beast for a day or two.

{Confession: Once the tourney got rolling and saw how much fun everyone was having - I wanted in! Gremlins or not!} Hopefully the reporting is a lot better at least.

Now on to the action!

15 min: Quiet and conservative action early it seems. Rjmech and Quagmire2753 finally hook up for a pot, with a flop of [Qs 8s Qc]. RJ bets and Quag raises. RJ pushes with (TT) and Quag calls with (A8). An [A] on the turn cripples RJ.

16 min: Meanwhile, Duder1123’s (17th) bad night ends as his (33) runs into Fusciardi’s (66).

18 min: A rare family pot, as seven players see a flop of [Ad 3d Qc]. Tigercub8189 bets small and is called by Quagmire2753 and Bigbrimar. The turn is a [9d]. Quag makes a middle bet and only the Tiger calls. The river is a [Tc]. Quag makes a nice value bet with his flush and Tiger calls it down with his two pair.

20 min: The short-stacked Rjmech (16th) has to go with (33) also and finds LittleRedElf’s (QQ) waiting for him. Tough night for RJ.

36 min: Boother36 (15th) and Quagmire2753 call a LittleRedElf raise and see a flop of [9d 8c Ah]. LRE bets, Boother calls and Quag raises! Only Boother calls. The turn is the [4d]. Boother checks, Quag bets and Boother moves all-in with a semi-bluff with (T9). Quag has to call with (A4) and the two pair - pre-river.

37 min: Douge2, Rennzzo, CrackBuyer, Absea98 (14th) and UMichPoker all see the flop of [8h 9s Kd]. This brings an all-in bet from Absea98 with (K4), which is called by UMich with an open ended straight draw (JT) – which hits!

46 min: Tigercub8189 (13th) has to try it with (Ah Qh), but is called by LittleRedElf with (JJ), and does not catch up.

54 min: Two short-stacks have to try and double up. ThePunk75 (12th) sees his (AK) all-in lose to Bigbrimar’s (Ah Jh), with a [J] on the river.

55 min: Douge2 (11th) has his two pair destroyed by TrippAA’s quad ladies!

59 min: Rennzzo fights off the Break Monster curse as his (QQ) doubles him up over TrippAA’s (JJ).

1st Break:
Quagmire2752 4510
Rennzzo 3654
Fuscairdi 3585
Nahanni74 2525
Bigbrimar 2395
CrackBuyer 2395
LittleRedElf 2325
TrippAA 1733
UMichPoker 1598
Akensi 780

63 min: The short stacked Akensi (10th) goes with (As 4s) and runs into LittleRedElf’s (AA).

70 min: UMichPoker loses a tough one and gets crippled as her (KK) all-in on a flop of [4QT] loses to the pocket (44) of TrippAA. But this is not the last we will see of these two going heads up this evening!

77 min: Quagmire2752 (9th) becomes the victim of the NPP 1st Break Chip Leader curse and gets bounced as his flopped two pair loses to Fusciardi’s trips.

95 min: A very short stacked Bigbrimar (8th) goes all-in with (JJ) and gets called in two places. UMichPoker trips her pocket (33).

96 min: Rennzzo first gets crippled as his (99) loses to CrackBuyer’s (AK) as it ends up making a bigger straight. Then Crack finishes Rennzzo (7th) the next hand.

100 min: UMichPoker (QQ) cripples Nahanni74’s stack (Ac Kc). But UMich gives a lot back as she calls Fusciardi’s (Ah Qh) all-in with (Ac 8c).

107 min: Nahanni74 (6th) sees her all-in with (TT) look pretty good on a flop of [QJ7] against CrackBuyer’s (AK). But a [Q] [J] turn and river gives her fatal kicker problems.

109 min: CrackBuyer (5th) tries with (AT) to run his heater into making a dent into TrippAA’s chip lead, but finds (KK) waiting for him.

110 min: LittleRedElf (4th), who won a PokerStars Razz tourney – while still playing us mortals at NPP – has to make a move with (Qh Jh) and finds UMichPoker holding (AA).

113 min: The shorter stacked Fusciardi (3rd) has to try with (Kc 4c){58%} and the big stack TrippAA, does his duty and tries to eliminate this dangerous player with (J9) {41%}. Tripp hits his 6.5 to 1 card [J] on the river to win it. Notice he was not that big a dog pre-flop.

Heads up: TrippAA 20000 - UMichPoker 5500

115 min: TrippAA 16900 - UMichPoker 8600

119 min: Big swing here as UMichPoker (A9) hits an [A] on the river to beat TrippAA’s (TT).

2nd break:
UMichPoker 17,300
TrippAA 8200

124 min: TrippAA (2nd) rightfully goes all-in with (A8) and is rightfully called by UMichPoker with (KQ). A [Q] on the turn ends the evening.

Congratulations to UMichPoker for an exciting win and special kudos to TrippAA, who has a 1st and 2nd in his first two tourneys at NPP. Wow!

1st – UMichPoker
2nd - TrippAA
3rd – Fusciardi
4th – LittleRedElf
5th – CrackBuyer
6th – Nahanni74
7th – Rennzzo
8th – Bigbrimar
9th – Quagmire2752

Standings for 2nd quarter and total points are on the right side of the blog!

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Where “Playing Cards” Started

Card games have always been the Cadillac of gambling. First played by royalty, card games have been the high rank of the ‘games of chance’ for centuries.

The Chinese dictionary, first published in 1678, puts the invention of playing card at around 1120 AD!

The popular theory is that the Arabs and Saracens were the first who brought them to southern Europe. The first European cards appeared in 1299 AD. They were hand-painted and only the very rich could afford them.

An engraver figured out that the ‘common folk’ would enjoy these card games too, and was the first to mass produce playing cards out of Basle, Switzerland. His name - Lord Faldo of Donkey Mountain.

The making of playing cards may have been the ‘necessity’ that spurned the invention of the printing press in the first place!

The first playing cards had biblical figures used for ‘face cards.’ When the playing cards finally made their way to France in 1360 that is when the deck took the final form it has today.

The four suits originally represented the four divisions of society. Hearts symbolized the Church. The Espads (the sword), or Spades stood for the military. The Clover or Clubs acknowledged the peasants. And the Diamonds represented the merchants.

There was this French circus animal trainer named Douge de LittleRedElf that was able to train his dog to play poker. Seeing a fortune to be made with this animal, he took the mutt to a talent agent.

In front of the agent, the trainer dealt out hands of draw poker. Each time the dog expertly took the cards in his teeth lightly and dryly and turned his back on the men. You could tell he was moving the cards around with his nose. The dog would then turn back around, set the cards face down on the table and push the cards he wanted to discard away with his nose, while barking once for a one card draw, twice for a two card draw, etc.

The trainer would verify with the agent that the dog had successfully selected the right cards to discard in order to make the best hand possible after the draw.

After a dozen hands or so, the agent, Sirgash de Shankapotomus said, “You are wasting my time mister. Sure, the dog can play poker, but every time he hits a good hand, he wags his tail.”

Friday, April 03, 2009

Douge2 Supplies Some Laughs

1. Do-Gooders

Faldo was sitting on a park bench finishing his lunch of a Big Mac and fries. After starting on the beer hidden in the paper bag and lighting up a cigar, a man on the bench across from him said to him, "You know eating like that, drinking like that and smoking like that isn't good for you. It will give you cancer, a heart attack, and make you fat."

Faldo replied, "Well, my grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat, drink and smoke the way you do?"

Faldo replied, "No, he minded his own fucking business."

2. Polite Way to Excuse Yourself

An instructor was trying to teach good manners to NPP players and asked her students the following question:

"Faldo, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Fadlo said, "Just a minute I have to go take a squirt."

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite. What a bout you Dave the Dog, how would you say it?"

Dave said, "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

The instructor said, "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Tigercub, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?"

Tigercub said "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."

The teacher fainted.