Saturday, December 05, 2009

If You Are Not Playing at NPP on Tuesdays, You Just Might Be….

A little take-off of on the – “you just might be a redneck” - tagline of Jeff Foxworthy.

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be…

Hen-pecked
– definition from the Urban Dictionary - When a male complies with every single demand of his girlfriend or wife, and the female is in complete control of her man.

A hen-pecked male will easily bow to his woman and blow off his friends.
Also see Pussy-whipped.

Context:
Bigbrimar: “Damn. 4Putt blew us off again for golf and poker to go get bossed around. He's so hen-pecked.”
Faldo: (Makes whipping sound) “Yeah, he's whipped.”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be….

Pussy-whipped
- definition from common sense – When a male will do anything in order to possibly get lucky that evening….or in the case of a married guy, that week or month.

Context:
LittleRedElf: “Cigar4john can’t play poker tonight. He is going to his sister-in-laws baby shower after party, and watching the kids to save a few hours of baby-sitter hours.”

ThePunk75: “Is he whipped or what?”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be a....

Sitzpinkler
- directly translated from German as - "a man who urinates whilst sitting down"; refers to a man who is hen-pecked or under the thumb of his wife/girlfriend, or is otherwise weak or effeminate.

Context:
Absea98: “Is Whilden coming down to the poker room later?”
Kensik: “What, are you kidding? You know he's a total sitzpinkler these days.”

If you are not playing on Tuesdays at NPP, you just might be a ….

Bryson
- definition from Great Britain - A hen-pecked, lightweight person. One who cannot handle their drinks and falls asleep easily.

Context:
Roll-call: 7Jokers, Beerhog, Boother36, Hlam14, and Greggst49 are not playing at NPP tonight – they are staying in with the wives and doing a Bryson.

Editor’s note: All names used in the ‘context’ descriptions were pulled - at random - from the thousands of male names used on the planet Earth and therefore are not to be taken literally if you know anyone who goes by these names. - Thank you

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

you forgot that if you're not playing at NPP on Tuesday nights you just might have a LIFE

Anonymous said...

Yeah right,
You have to get a life before you have a life.

Nik Faldo said...

uh....Poker is Life.
NPP is Poker!
Life is NPP.
Go to NPP - to have an NPP.

Or as Ty in Caddy Shack said it so well;

"Be NPP, See NPP. May...make...Make it. Make it to NPP."

BigBri said...

"Caddy Shack" ?
Faldo I think even Carl the greenskeeper could find time for NPP on Tuesday nights. Thats because he doesn't have to fight with his wife to take his apron off, like some ex players of NPP.

"It's in the hole"

fourputt said...

I am so ashamed. I feel like I have no testicles.

fourputt said...

...But how does one find time for both family and golf - especially if ya gots little crumb crunchers?

Nik Faldo said...

The answer NoPutt is to;
Grow a pair,
Tell wife to do her job on Tuesday evening and watch her kids that you gave her - and she owes you eternal gratitude for that.

If she can manage that, you tell her you will reward her with sex tomorrow or the next day - at your convenience.

But you lose with the first three words - so nevermind.