Sunday, September 05, 2010

He is the Real "Most Interesting Man in the World!"

Faldo made an album of one of his hands clapping, and it went Platinum in four days.

Strippers pay Faldo in order to give him a lap dance.

Faldo’s athleticism is that of legend. Faldo once caught his own home run ball.

When hunting, Faldo’s quarry simply surrenders to him – be it game – or women.

Faldo obeys gravity, but Faldo doesn’t have to.

Faldo did not play in the NFL because of the two – minute warning. Faldo heeds no warnings.

The sun cannot burn Faldo…even if it wanted to.

When Faldo touches 14k gold…and it turns into 24k gold.

Faldo has never needed an eraser, White-out or the back-space on his computer.

Faldo pulls cops over – just because Faldo can.

Trains stop at road crossings … just in case Faldo is coming.

Any city Faldo enters…Faldo already has the key.

Faldo never needs a credit card. His word is good enough.

His brain is registered as a lethal weapon.

The resale value on Faldo’s used car is higher than the price of any new car.

Faldo always has his cake and eats it too.

Faldo increases property values by 50% simply by visiting.

Faldo gave a word of poker advice to a young man once…and Phil Ivey never looked back.

In a college football game, Faldo caught his own touchdown pass.

Faldo can stand in a rainstorm and decide not to get wet.

Faldo can lead horses to water…and make them drink.

Faldo is banned from the Guinness Book of World Records to give other people a chance.

Faldo was the motivation for the James Bond 007 series.

There are three things in life that are certain; death, taxes…and Faldo.

Faldo says, “I rarely lose at poker. But when I is always a bad beat. Stay tilt-free my friends.”


Anonymous said...

Thou shall not par-take in the spirts on Sunday, you clearly had a few to many before noon!!!

Nik Faldo said...

I only wish Salma Hayek and Jessica Alba would not co-author a post. Not that it is not true, but it is embarrassing. Then, if I don't deny it, I may look... slightly vain.

Fourputt said...

Please share whatever the heck you are smoking