Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Douge2’s Humor Corner – XXXVI

Homework Anyone?

A foursome is waiting on the men's tee while another foursome of ladies is hitting from the ladies' tee.

The ladies are taking their time, when finally the last lady is ready to hit the ball. She hacks it 10 feet; goes over to it, whiffs it; and then hacks it maybe another 10 feet; and then hacks it another 5 feet.

She looks up at the men who are watching and says apologetically, "I guess all those fucking lessons I took this winter didn't help."

One of the men immediately replies, "Well, there you have it lady.You should have taken golf lessons instead."


I Tell You, It’s In the Genes!

A golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him.

"I have some good news and some bad news," says the surgeon."The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!"

"Oh God no!" cries the man. "My golfing is over! Please Doc, what's the good news?"

"The good news is, I have another one to replace it with, but it's a woman's arm.

I'll need your permission before I go ahead with the transplant."

"Go for it doc" says the man. "As long as I can play golf again."

The operation went well and a year later the man was out on the golf course when he bumped into the surgeon.

"Hi, how's the new arm?" asks the surgeon.

"Just great," says the businessman. "I'm playing the best golf of my life. My new arm has a much finer touch and my putting has really improved."

"That's great," said the surgeon.

"Not only that," continued the golfer, "my handwriting has improved, I've learned how to sew my own clothes and I've even taken up painting landscapes in watercolors."

"Unbelievable!" said the surgeon, "I'm so glad to hear the transplant was such a great success. Are you having any side effects?"

"Well, just one problem," said the golfer. "Every time I get an erection, I also get a headache."

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