Douge2 Humor Corner LVIII

Actual Bumper Stickers

“Breast Inspection Next Truck Cab…please have’em out”

“I am not an alcoholic. I am a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings.”

“Driver carries no cash….he is married.”

“Wife and dog missing. Reward for dog.”

“4 out of 3 people have trouble with fractions.”

“Drugs Lead No Where….but it is the scenic route.”

“The shortest sentence is ‘I am’. The longest is ‘I do.’”

“Where in the hell is Easy Street?”

“Keep honking…I’m re-loading.”

“Work harder…millions of Democrats live off your taxes.”


You Know You Are a Redneck if….

1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines. '

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

Note: Heads up tourney bracket is on the Right Side of the blog!