We are averaging seven players per tourney. Not bad with the summer months behind us.
I would like to double the average for next year. Recruit for next year.
This month I will give the:
Total points
Points per start average
Tournament win percentage
Kind of interesting statistics:
1 – MikeNiks - Faldo 168, 5.3, 6.3%
2 - Boother 124, 4.4, 17.9%
3 – Sev4TSev 118, 5.1, 30.4%
4 – Rownder 103, 4.7, 27.3%
5 – Matchy 90, 3.3, 11.1%
6 – ArticBlast 63, 2.3, 3.6%
7 – Beerhog 51, 4.3, 25%
8 – Nahanni 47, 3.9, 25%
9 – Momo 42, 3.5, 25%
10 – Duder 28, 2.3, 0%
11 – Cigar4John 28, 3.5, 0%
12 – BonAir 28, 3.5, 0%
13 – Aqualung 18, 3.0, 16.7%
14 – Herbavor-Hlam 14, 2.8, 0%
15 – Bronco 12, 3.0, 25%
16 – DavetheDog 9, 3.0, 0%
17 – 1stout 3, 1.5, 0%
18 – SpartyTojo 1, .5, 0%
19 – Tigercub 0, 0, 0%
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Tiger Woods is driving a Lexus out in the stix of Tennessee.
He stops for gas and when he opens the door to get out, a few tees fall to the ground.
When he walks up to the porch to pay the old man in the rocking chair, the old man says, "What kind of car is that?"
Tiger says proudly, "It's a Lexus and the most expensive model they make."
The old man whistles and says, "Sure is pretty. But what is that on the ground?"
Tiger says, "Those are tees to hold my balls up when I drive."
The old man shakes his head and says, "Damn Lexus guys think of everything!"
Tiger woods was getting out of his Lotus, when a redneck approaches him.
Tiger says, "Hello".
Redneck says, "Hiya, whatcha got there?"
Tiger replies, "My clubs".
Redneck says, "What fer?"
Tiger replies, "To hit my balls".
Redneck gets all excited and asks if he can see them.
Tiger reluctantly sets his bag down and the redneck gets on his knees while grabbing Tiger's pants.
Tiger pulls away and smashes the redneck over the head with his fist and says, "What are you doing?"
The redneck, now embarrassed, apologizes and gets up from the ground, but then takes a club from the bag and whacks Tiger in the groin.
Tiger buckles over and falls to the ground, but luckily a little old lady is watching and reports what she sees to the parking lot attendant, who immediately confronts the redneck and wrestles him to the ground.
A short time later, while waiting for the authorities to arrive, the redneck is detained near the putting green, and many onlookers gather around and create quite a hubub.
Meanwhile, Fourputt is on the green practicing by himself for the first time in two years and is amazed that all these people are gathered around him.
After missing several putts from just under three feet, the crowd appears even larger, and just as the sweat starts to roll off of his brow, Nik Faldo appears, and tells him to relax. Faldo says, "You see all those people? They've all gathered here because they know it'll be at least another two years before they see someone miss more tap-ins than themselves. It's just motivation for them. Think of yourself as a motivator."
Fourputt winces and doesn't quite believe him. Just behind Faldo, is Tolly, sporting two hot dogs, a bag of chips, and a beer. Tolly says to Fourputt, "Noooo, all those people are talking about that guy over there, he hit Tiger Woods' balls. Here, have some chips." [Fourputt ignores the potato chip offer] Faldo takes the chips and then also muscles a dog from Tolly who could not protect it or he'd spill his beer. Fourputt says, "What do you mean he hit his balls?" Now Beerhog who has entered the fray, sporting two beers of his own, belts out, "Who hit who's nuts? What are you guys talking about?" So Tolly replies, "That guy over there hit Tiger Woods' balls." Fourputt asks, "Out on the course?", to which Beerhog immediately replies, "No, in the parking lot, dumbass..."
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