Tomservo2 Wins His 10th Tournament of the Season! One Reg Season Week Left!

Tomservo2 is beating the pants off of us!

Tomservo2 continues to pound the NPP regulars - even though he doesn't have to. He is probably just softening us up for the Tournament of Champions and the NPP Finals coming up.

2nd - T3chlady
3rd - Greggst49
Bubble - LittleRedElf

There is only one week left in the NPP regular season. We still have an exciting race for the last seat in the Final. And there is still one last chance to qualify for the Tournament of Champions if you have not won a tournament yet this year. So plenty on the line next week.

Be here

Congratulations to Tomservo2 on his 31st NPP victory!

 Ok, Now for a reality check as to what is most important in life:

 In 1923, Who Was:

1. President of the largest steel company?
2. President of the largest gas company?
3. President of the New York stock Exchange?
4. Greatest wheat speculator?
5. President of the Bank of International Settlement?
6. Great Bear of Wall Street?

These men were considered some of the worlds most successful of their
days. Now, 80 years later, the history book asks us, if we know what
ultimately became of them. The Answers:

1. The president of the largest steel company.
Charles Schwab - died a pauper.

2. The president of the largest gas company,
Edward Hopson - Went insane.

3. The president of the NYSE,
Richard Whitney - was released from prison to die at home.

4. The greatest wheat speculator.
Arthur Cooger - Died abroad, penniless.

5. The president of The Bank of International Settlement, Shot himself.

6 The Great Bear of Wall Street,
Cosabee Livermore - Also committed suicide

However,

In that same year, 1923, the PGA Champion
And the winner of the most important golf tournament,
The US Open was Gene Sarazen.

What became of him?

He played golf until he was 92,
Died in 1999 at the age of 95.
He was financially secure
At the time of his death.

The Moral: Screw  work. Play golf.

And speaking of that:

 

Faldo Wins to Qualify for the Tournament of Champions

Women are always happier doing what they are born to do.

The elite poker players of NPP allowed an interloper to qualify for the Tournament of Champions.

This is similar to allowing a 22-handicap Monday night golf league golfer qualify for the Masters.
Faldo wins a tournament - which means Hell froze over or ....Bigbrimar bought a beer on the golf course.....or Beerhog had a drive hit the fairway.

Notice Faldo did not say it stayed on the fairway, just that it hit the fairway.

2nd - GMOGolf
3rd - Rachael0388
Bubble - Absea98

Now for some divine intervention:



Sitting by the window of her convent, Sister Barbara opened a letter from home one evening. Inside the letter was a $100 bill her parents had sent. Sister Barbara smiled at the gesture.
As she read the letter by the window, she noticed a shabbily dressed stranger leaning against the lamp post below. Quickly, she wrote, “Don’t despair. – Sister Barbara,” on a piece of paper, wrapped the $100 bill in it, got the man’s attention and tossed it out the window to him.
The stranger picked it up, and with a puzzled expression and a tip of his hat, went off down the street.
The next day, Sister Barbara was told that a man was at her door, insisting on seeing her. She went down, and found the stranger waiting. Without a word, he handed her a huge wad of $100 bills. “What’s this?” she asked.
“That’s the $8,000 you have coming Sister,” he replied. “Don’t Despair paid 80-to-1.”

Douge2 and LittleRedElf Do it Again! - Both Win #8 of the Year!

LRE and Douge2's fans are cheering too hard.

Douge2 and LittleRedElf continue to dominate the 4th quarter of the NPP League. Both had twelve person fields to overcome.

Douge2's pointing victims:

2nd - Tomservo2
3rd - T3chlady
4th - GMOgolf
Bubble - 95corolla

And LittleRedElf's pointing victims:

2nd - Mikeniks-Faldo
3rd - T3chlady
4th - GMOgolf
Bubble - Douge2

Congratulations to Douge2 on his 30th NPP win!

Congratulations to LittleRedElf on his 39th NPP win!


Ok, so what does Faldo want to talk about today? How about a couple of Faldo's philosophical observations?"

Looking back over Faldo's 6+ decades of life, Faldo spent close to 90% of earnings on booze, softball, hockey, golf, fishing, chess, poker, and women. The rest of the money Faldo just wasted.

Faldo's last three rules to live by:

1) If it flies, floats, or f--ks, it's cheaper to rent it!

2) If it's got tits or tires, you're gonna have problems with it.

3) In the poker game of life, women are the rake.

Also this just came into the NPP helpful hints for women email:

Dear Faldo,

I want to get my boob size increased to two or three sizes bigger than they currently are. I want to do this to spice up my husband and my love life. Things seemed to have slowed down and he seemed to have lost interest. Enclosed is a picture of me and you can see that I am pretty, but my boobs are just not very big. 

The problem is we are not financially well off and the cost of the surgery is more than we can afford at this time.

Do you know of an inexpensive way to make my boobs bigger in order to get my husband revved up again? Thank you!

Signed, Wanting Sex Again With Hubby

Dear Wanting,

You are indeed a very pretty lady. You should be able to get your boobs at least that size bigger you wanted, and I suspect even bigger! You can also do this very inexpensively and it will be much Much safer than surgery.

Simply rub toilet paper between your breasts 5 to 6 times a day. Your breasts will slowly start getting bigger and bigger, until they are the size you desire.

That is all there should be to it. 

From your picture, this method seems to have had the exact same effect on your butt.

Glad to help out.

Signed,

Faldo